Daily Origami

Yeah, the Origami calendar has been sucking it up for a while. Mostly I've just been making one of these boats instead of the day's suggestion. Hopefully tomorrow's will be good. Otherwise I'll put up the paper airplane I made last week. Its kinda cool.

Monday at 8 Timeslot up 183%

I never understand ratings. TV ratings. Where do they come from? How are they compiled? What do they mean? I used to be terribly perplexed by all the strange results they got. Now I think I've figured it out. The people they monitor are the morons who are affected by advertising. I'm much too smart to fall for that old routine, so the networks don't even pay attention to my opinion. Well you know what? I'm going to buy everything they advertise during the last two hours of arrested development. How do you like that networks? I can be impulsive too you know... No, I probably won't do that.

Media Life Magazine

iPod Weapons

I know, its weak to be one of those iPod carrying sheep that just does what they're told. But I do my best to break from the mold. I never wear those white headphones, I rip all my m4p's into mp3's, and now I'm going to cut out the iTunes. Oh baby, it'll be sweet. Especially cause I need all the free memory I can get on my computer. Anyone know how to make firefox not suck up so much? Don't tell me its all those sweet sweet extensions I have installed. I need them. Oh, back to the iPod thing:

Hack Attack: The self-sustaining iPod - Lifehacker

Think you're anonymous?

This is cool. I know you can figure out where people are (country, city) based on their IP, but this is within like a mile. Wow. Stop by ipmonkey first if you don't know your IP.

SEOmoz :: AJAX Powered IP Location Lookup

Rules for Life

Ok, lets say you're the only cashier at the store. There is a line of oh, ten people, growing increasingly more impatient. You are NOT allowed to make comments to whoever you're checking out. Things like:

"oh, this is cute"
"only 5 dollars? that is a good deal"
"do you want this in another bag?"
"let me see if there is another on in back"

I swear, she did this for every customer. Well, every customer but me; I gave her three words "Hi" "No" and "Credit". Do you not understand that this is my lunch break? I'm standing in line at 12:30 on a weekday and I look pissed off. There's your hint. Take it and run. Before I find something to bludgeon you with.

We don't need no stinking fusion

Alright, I know. I'm a lazy bastard. But honestly yesterday was a slow internet day. If I still had my internet rating sidebar up it would have read "holy crap stop wasting your time, there's nothing out there" Anyway, here's a little green for today. I don't really think this would be better than a fusion reactor, but it sounds less like a bad scifi movie when its explained to me. All those buzz kills writing in the comments section need to calm down too. Its not like you'll be crushed by spinning blades of death from above. Have they ever heard of constructive criticism? Like "hey, why don't you stick one of those in the water and take advantage of the gulf stream, or the tides?"

Flying windmills could provide limitless power - Engadget

Volcano Soliloquy

I breathe.  The air is thin and I gasp to catch my breath.  My boots seemed light at the start, but now their weight pulls heavily with every step.  I take my pack off and sit on the coarse rocks underfoot.  My seat is near the edge of a slope that runs down and down, plummeting into the glistening white valley below.  The rocks below poke at my tender posterior as I try to shuffle into a more comfortable position.  As uncomfortable as I am, it is still wonderful to sit.  My muscles ache and throb as they cool.  The sweat that accumulated on my back has soaked through my sweatshirt and I feel the breeze whisking it away, and my warmth with it.  It feels wonderful, the cool hand of wind reaching through my shirt and caressing my back, soothing the burning muscles within.  My feet begin to tingle from the sojourn; blood seeps back down into the crevasses and capillaries from which it had been forced during the climb.  The distance is concealed by a flotilla of clouds that hovers just below my elevation.  It is an infinite plane of cotton, wisping and wofting, ethereally blanketing the far off mountains that I now look down upon.  Behind me the sun patiently beats.  It seems less intense now even though it is higher in the Russian sky.  Underneath it, Mount Avochinsky stretches up, yearning to scrape the heavens that seem to stoop for it.  We have walked so far.  We have overcome so much.  We are only halfway to the summit.  
It is time for lunch and a break.  I sit and survey my kingdom; I have gradually conquered it with my deliberate paces.  I listen.  There is nothing.  There are few places and times on earth where this happens; normally there is some disruption of perfect silence.  Here there are no highways, no waves, no insects, no birds, and right now there is no wind.  I revel in its glory, high above all things.  All invention, all wealth, all mankind cannot replicate its serenity or beauty.  
It is shattered.  A delicate crystalline figure falls from my hands, smashing to the marble floor.  Silence is slaughtered by the vociferous chatter of my comrades. Their mindless voices pain me as I struggle to hold the pieces of my cherished prize.  It is gone though, the wind begins again and I relinquish hope of solitude.  I shiver as a cool razor slices into me, tears at my flesh.  I am no longer hot, and will soon be cold since I no longer have exertion to keep warm.  I pull out my jacket and throw it on as I sit.  I also take my lunch out and unwrap the sandwich.  It has a single slice of bread topped with salami and cheese.  The bread is coarse and thick in my hand, while my fingers wick up grease from the meat when they skim its surface.  I take a bite and the flavor of the cheese dominates my palate.  Full and genuine the taste runs through my mind without finding an exact match.  It is similar to other cheeses, but richer and fresher.  I can almost see the Russian cow that it came from alive in front of me.  The bread does not have a strong enough taste to compete, but its texture mixes as I chew and becomes smoother with every grind.  The meat comes through as the cheese fades; it is a tasty salami and savory too.  The sandwich taste melds and lingers before fading.  My moment has expired; it is time to move on.  I eagerly rise and gear-up, fresh from my brief reprieve.  My rest has strengthened my spirits and renewed my resolve.  This is only half a mountain and I will soon see the satisfaction of the summit for myself.

Ah Engrish

From my TiVo newsletter:

Andy Y., who currently enjoys Project Runway [coincidentally the "Recommend It!" last newsletter] with his two girls, 8 & 10, and hockey with the San Jose Sharks.

So does that mean his two daughters are models on Project Runway, or that the San Jose Sharks come over and watch hockey with him?

Smell the Steak

Anyone seen Skittles Gum in stores? Oh, and I love how Steve writes.

The Sneeze - Half zine. Half blog. Half not good with fractions.

Face Tracking

Technology is finally catching up to itself. There are cameras everywhere these days whether you realize it or not. The only trouble is that there was no way to filter through or search through all the footage that was generated. That might've provided you with a small sense of anyonomity, but don't count on it much longer. Companies like 3vr security have developed facial recognition algorithms (its all about the algorithms folks) that remember a face and track it across separate feeds. Take, for example, a hotel employee that was notoriously hard to find during his graveyard shift. Management used their new software to search through hours of footage from 16 cameras and tracked his movements around the hotel. Until, that is, he left by way of a back door and never returned. Kind of cool to think of automatically tracking people by remote observation. But if the concepts in Enemy of the State, Minority Report or Resident Evil (no not the zombies) made you a little uneasy, you know why this could spark some controversy . Do you know how many cameras are in your municipality? Traffic cameras, businesses, ATMs, buses. These systems are only going to get better, so if you were worried about the government tracking you with your cell phone don't worry. They'll do it with your face. Oh, and our hotel scamming slacker? He got canned along with 9 of his friends.

Defense Tech: These Cameras Don't Forget a Face

American Civil Liberties Union : Feature on Face-Recognition Technology

Space trash

Are we so hard up for NASA funds that we're willing to use trash as satellites? They're going to toss out an old space suit from the space station - and into orbit. Apparently a Russian came up with the idea, which makes me think of that stereotypical cosmonaut who's always insane, drunk, and fixing life support systems with duct tape and a hammer. Luckily, the drunk mellows out the insane and everyone knows half of MIR was made from duct tape. Unfortunately you take your chances with the hammer.

The Suit's batteries should only last a couple days, so make sure you fire up your ham radio to try and decipher the hidden message it broadcasts. Before long it'll degrade into a terminal orbit and taste a fiery death. At first I was thinking they'd put it into a stable orbit, which kind reminded me of Pirates of the Carribean. You know that scene where the pirate skeletons are hanging by nooses outside the town? Kinda like a warning to any aliens that might think about stopping by for some pillaging. "This is what we do to... astronauts."

NASA - SuitSat

RIAA suit

I'm not sure if they're really going this way, but people seem to interpret it as if they're going after shared folders on your home network. I like this comment though:

if I leave a CD on the front seat of my car with the doors unlocked? Did I break the law?

Digital Music News: Insider Blogs

Algorithms for better living

I feel like this is similar to all those kitchen gadgets that came out in like the 40's. You know the ads with the woman in a house dress smiling way too broadly while using her electric mixer. Big changes become everyday, and soon you don't even think about how easy it is to microwave something. Maybe I'm wrong and maybe I explained that poorly. Here's the jist: Google is good, but its gonna get better. You won't even think about it, but it'll be better. Ah algorithms, the garbage men of technology; vital but ignored.

Current Google Algorithm
Big Daddy Algorithm

Digg - details

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adclassix.com

Terrorister

Wow, Friendster just for terrorists! Ever wondered how we could blame Al Qaeda for the Cole bombing? I can make that connection in three links. I don't know where the information is from, how accurate it is, or who manages it. But just at a glance it seems to be well made. I don't see Kevin Bacon on there though, so I don't think it'll solve all your problems.

Tracking the Threat
Oracle of Bacon

RSS Tricks

I like RSS. I tried reading a newspaper the other day and it was unfulfilling. I had to read too much and got not enough. The articles I care about are all two weeks old in print and there's not very much information anyway. Here's a page that lets you stretch the power of RSS past headlines. Some of them don't seem terribly useful like email or contacts, but look at this Google News Arrested Delvelopment Feed. That's pretty cool.

12 things you can get over RSS besides news - download squad

Update
Holy crap. You know that 2 hour 4 episode block of Arrested Development that Fox is going to air on Feb 10? Guess what its up against. Um... The 2006 Winter Olympics Opening Ceremonies. I'm excited and fearful. For me, there's no question what I'm going to watch. I'd stay inside if it was raining 3 dollar cupcakes to see the last of Arrested Development. But I've recently come to grips with the fact that I have no idea what the rest of the country is thinking. Would they seriously plunk down and watch the Ceremonies for 4 hours? And even if they do get curious during a commercial, will watching the last episode make any sense; will they appreciate it this late in the game? Oh goodness. Alright, I'm going to go buy another copy of season 2 cause my disc 2 is missing. Hey, extra DVD sales can't hurt, right?

Donny the Delegating Robot

More household robots, huh? Sounds ok, except for two things:
1. Why did you make it look like a character from final fantasy?
2. I don't need my robots to delegate, that's what I'm here for. Delegation leads to the following scenario.

me: I want a beer.
robot: Get me one while you're at it.

See? Now I've just paid god knows how much for a lazier version of myself. Which is lazy. Robots should do what I say when I say, not look to pass the buck. Imagine you're making a chicken patty and the microwave whispers "Couldn't the toaster oven do this for me?"

- Engadget

Avgo Soccer

I can't believe all these guys are professional drivers, but I'd say they all are having fun.

Avgo Soccer

Happy With Apple

Yes, I know, its a shocker. They haven't changed their public attitude or anything, this is strictly a me and them thing. In a bright shining moment since my hard drive crashed two weeks ago the Apple iTunes Music Store re-enabled all the downloads I've bought from them. So I re-downloaded all 495 songs (now back in m4p format, damn) and actually backed them up on DVD this time. It was actually fairly simple once I convinced them I just hadn't misplaced my files ("No, I know where they are. They're on the dead hard drive I just physically took out of my computer) They did wag their finger and say this was a one time deal, but I think I've learned my lesson. Anyway, thanks apple, cool move. And also, I've bought 500 songs from them? Holy crap.

Things you never thought could kill you

Anti helocopter mines? Seriously?
Defense Tech: "Aerial IED," Part Three

Pictures Pretty...

This is kinda a cool idea. It involves identifying icons in place of a traditional password login. The interesting concept is that you don't actually identify the icons, so that someone who's casually watching can't figure out your login information. You click in the area defined by three key icons in various configurations several times to prove that you know hidden information without revealing that information. I don't think this'll replace passwords anytime soon, but I like concepts that innovate and challenge the standard.

For example I was on a few planes this past week and whenever the seatbelt sign went out at the gate, out came the treos the black berries and all those other phones with too many buttons that I don't keep track of. They're all so silly. We finally figure out how to make a small enough phone and now they're having to make them bugger to fit a keyboard on, or a usable screen. Its like someone though about else a phone could do (email, web browsing) and automatically went with the standard interface for those tasks, even though they are incongruous with the first concept. We wanted a smaller phone, not a laptop folks. Why don't you hire some guys to think about how else to make this happen. Voice typing? Virtual keyboards? Projected, hollographic or rolling displays? Something new. Please?

Anyway, try out the demo of the passicon thing is you have time, not a must see, but interesting.

Rutgers Media Relations - Graphical Passwords Enhance Computer Security Thanks to Rutgers-Camden Research

They'll Only Break Your Heart

Why should I even start to watch these new shows they're putting on TV?  Best case scenario we have a few good years together and then the actors get all big headed and leave; but they'll never find better work cause they'll always be The Fonz or Arnold.  What's the point of letting these weak new sitcoms into my livingroom?  They'll never fill the shoes of shows I've loved and lost. 

Read the article carefully: Fox is giving Arrested Development a Special Two Hour Viking Funeral, where they'll shoot their load of the last four episodes and roll off in search of better programming; which they won't find. Thanks for keeping Arrested from getting warn-out like that Seinfeld show. I hate Fox.

CNN.com - Bye-bye 'Malcolm,' 'That '70s Show' - Jan 18, 2006

Suck it up

A hiatus (from Latin hiatus, -us, m.: gap; cf. hiare, hio, hiavi (hisco); Greek (χαίνω) έ-χαν-ον, κέχηνα; Old High German ginēn; German 'gähnen' -> "yawn") is a suspension or interruption in the intensity or amount of something.

Don't mess with wendy's, you'll

Don't mess with wendy's, you'll go to jail for 9 years.

Nanny-bot

Whew south Korea, slow down. I dunno if the world is ready for useful robots.

The bots, according to the Ministry, will be able to perform such household tasks as cleaning, monitoring homes, reading to children, and ordering pizza via the Internet

I do know of one person however that will need this, if only for its internet pizza ordering skills.

Korea to introduce household bots to watch the kids, clean and order pizza - Engadget

Readme

Flying Objects!

BBC NEWS | Health | Woman's scent can lure or repel

F-22A Raptor Aircraft Ready For Combat - Aviran’s Place

Best of Google Video

Time runs out for the wristwatch

Blogcritics.org: I'm A Programmer, Not A Computer Guy

No Whining

No seriously. We'll fire your ass for whining. They say its to promote positive attitude, but I know the real reason. They had one of those 'No Whining' signs and wanted to give it some purpose beyond humorous wall hanging status. Well... that, and its fun to fire whiners. Don't whine.

Inquirer

Lights out baby.

Wow, this kinda stuff really happens huh? Blind crippled convicts in prison ordering hitmen to whack witnesses. Well, he got what we do when you kill a few people. There's something about having to plead to Arnold for clemency that can't inspire hope for someone in that situation.

John Connor:
You just can't go around killing people.
The Terminator:
Why?
John Connor:
What do you mean why? 'Cause you can't.
The Terminator:
Why?
John Connor:
Because you just can't, OK? Trust me on this.

BBC NEWS | Americas | Elderly US killer is put to death

I wanna be a Dead Guy when I grow up

Well, I don't.  But this guy does.

Photos: Dead Body Guy--dying to be a corpse | CNET News.com

Ouch

I just paid for my tv. It hurt a little bit to charge it, but the real sting is in paying it off. I guess that means I've had it for about a month, seems a lot longer though. Month-iversary party?

Vision for the future

Alright, stop all this mess with hydrogen and gas and hybrids. Make electric cars and hook them up to the electric grid. Sure, its fueled by fossil fuels now; but hey, that's no worse than running a gas car now. And when we get that fusion reactor online in France, we'll be able to hook all the cars in the world up to it and instantly transition into zero fossil dependency. You see the difference? 30 years of trying to create viable electric cars starting now vs 30 years of dicking around with gas sucking suvs and trying to transition as quickly as possible. Ah nevermind, you guys never listen to me anyway. At least the American car companies don't. But that's ok, you guys are going down, just like AOL. Maybe not today maybe not tomorrow, but someday soon.

The World's Fastest Electric Car - Forbes.com

Wow, that's a lot of programs.

Imagine that Seinfeld where Elaine knocks out the power to her neighbor's apartment cause the alarm won't shut off and the neighbor has a cat that is going to starve and she borrows Kramer's meat slicer. The whole episode they make references to how Elaine's building smells like potatoes and when Kramer pulls Elaine's doorknob off he falls backwards into another apartment. The neighbor says "hey, get the hell out of here!" and Kramer (lying on the floor) replies "Wow, that's a lot of potatoes". That's how you should read the title to this post.

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