Daily Placebo

Do We Need Data Privacy Laws?

2011-10-20T09:08:00.001-07:00

Your Internet data: more like Redcoats living in your home or black gold in the ground?

Holy crap these people are morons. The 3rd amendment, really? That's not really my go-to amendment for supporting arguments about the right to privacy; and shouldn't the modern interpretation be that soldiers can't use your WiFi without consent? It's about about having to afford agents of the state with accommodations in peacetime. Collecting information about you, well that seems more up the search and seizure alley to me.

But none of that really matters at all because we're not discussing constitutional limitations of the government, we're talking about private companies potentially using information about individuals without consent; and companies are not bound by constitution, they are bound by legislation.

So we move on to Rep. Marsha Blackburn, corporate advocate, who thinks your personal information is akin to a natural resource. She thinks we should "allow our free market to explore this natural resource and learn to commercialize it, protect it, and respect it." Uh... the free market hasn't really been so great about creating sustainable cycles of use and stewardship when it comes to the natural resources it depends on. More like exploit, monetize and move on. If she read up on The Tragedy Of The Commons she might observe that most companies participate in a land grab to box out competitors and aren't so big on communal use of public property for public good. Not that they should be; they're entities designed to funnel money into the hands of their shareholders. They're not some kind of representative agency created to protect the interests of its citizens.

"Why should government be the decision maker?"

*snap* *snap* Marsha! Over here! Pay ATTENTION. We created the government as an agent to represent its people and protect their natural rights from being violated. In nature man's right to life, liberty, and property are in danger from other men. And since "we" cleverly decided that corporations are people too, the government needs to protect us from them too.

So, jumping back to your terrible analogy of user information as a natural resource; this isn't some undersea oilfield in US territorial waters where bureaucrats can exchange drilling rights for coke and Bj's. This is more like the natural gas fields underneath people's homes in New York state, it technically belongs to someone else even if they're not using it right now.

Companies need to get permission by individually offering property owners enticements of cash and lies. What representative Blackburn is suggesting would make slant drilling the standard, where companies try to siphon off as much product as they can without the actual owners physically cutting them off. It's not stealing if there's just no laws that mention it.

I understand that there's a large grey area in the arena of intellectual property like this and data about me may not technically belong to me. For instance, street planners may survail traffic patterns and the fact that I use a certain street twice a day could be included in that summary. That sounds pretty reasonable in an aggregate analysis, but it starts to sound a little creepy if the study records my individual license plate number or has enough stations in town to record my individual movements with a certain accuracy. But such is the case with publicly observable facts and information, we'll need to work through as a society to decide what types of surveillance clash with a reasonable expectation of privacy. Some methods will probably end up being technically legal but socially unacceptable, while we might decide to flat out ban others.

Separate from public facts is private data accessible only to specific entities, only through a special or business relationship. This could be information your utility generates about you as a result of the service they provide. (location, call history, data usage, browser history, power consumption, payment habits) It's private information that many of us would think twice before actively divulging in a corporate survey, but in many cases is being compiled without the user's knowledge or express permission. This intimate data becomes available to the company as a side-effect of the user's service.

I imagine a tenant-landlord situation where, as a result of living in the apartment, the occupant can unknowingly disclose information about himself to the renter. Some of the incidental data may seem innocuous like what time someone goes to work in the morning, while other potential information would be very sensitive and gross invasions of privacy to have collected and stored.

As much as I distrust industry in general to use private data responsibly, I'm equally wary of the idiots discussing the issues above. They're the ones that are supposed to have a firm enough grasp on the concept to write the rules that protect those of us not savvy enough to protect themselves.

Real Names On The Internets.

2011-08-23T07:16:00.001-07:00

Some people are getting a little uppity cause Google said "Hey guys can we all just put down our real names on Google Plus?" Yeah, I've got a pseudonym or two that I'm known to employ, so I completely understand the appeal of writing something up and sending it all over the world without feeling like some pissed-off ogre will come knocking at your door. That's the beauty of anonymous speech and I think it's an important part of the Internet and life in general. But I don't agree that anonymous interactions are appropriate in every possible corner of the Internet. Here's an article that seems to think it's being cheated out of something by Google's social networking reboot.

InformationWeek: 5 Reasons Google+'s Name Policy Fails

For the TL;DR crowd:

#1: I will be really mean to you because I know who you are.

#2: I won't say offensive things because I'm afraid of what you will think.

#3: I will find loopholes.

#4: I have confused privacy with anonymity.

#5: I noticed that other services are different.

I know, I know, I'm taking Google's side again. And mostly I don't care about the issue, but it does make it easier to figure out if I know someone or not (you ever try to look back through your mid-90's AIM contact list and remember who each SN is?) Maybe it's cause I'm almost 30 and I enjoy organizing my address book, but I like having a reliable list of contacts at my disposal with addresses and phone numbers, heck even job titles. It took me like 2 years to figure out that Jeff was "Clark Griswald" on FB for some reason. If you wanna share things publicly as karebear24 that's fine, there's still twitter and wordpress and digg but I see Google+ more as an auto-updated Rolodex contact card than a soapbox/megaphone for faux-lebrities trying to shoehorn more eyeballs onto their egos like most of these tech analysts want it to be. You don't like it, fine don't use it. Frankly I'll be perfectly happy if G+ never takes off enough that local news stations are begging me to Circle them on the Googles.

Check this dude out.

2011-02-10T08:57:00.001-08:00

If I were a pelican I too would sit on the pier waiting for fishermen to feed me their catch. Fun fact: the pelican's distinctive bill and crazy ass neck area are an evolutionary advancement designed to make tourists take pictures of them.

We're About Done Here.

2011-01-26T13:00:00.001-08:00

So it seems like some of my thoughts might get passed to someone who can decide to pass them to someone else if they want. Consumerism in action! I also got a call this afternoon from another representative who wanted me to reiterate my problem verbally. I declined since the last rep indicated that my request had been fulfilled. I've gotta say that they certainly had lots of people responding to me fairly quickly, if not completely in the manner I'd hoped. Maybe Sprint is aware there could be some pushback and wants to alleviate people's concerns and complaints.

I think I showed unprecedented restraint not ripping into the various, irrelevant, repetitious and often essentially meaningless ad copy each of these representatives is apparently required to insert into their replies. Lets look at some now, shall we?

3G Customers benefit just as much as 4G users when purchasing the HTC EVO with the $10 Premium Data Fee.

Uh, no. You just said in the prior sentence that 4G customers get faster data speeds. That is a benefit that 3G customers don't get.

The embedded Premium Services allow you to do more than ever before within the 3G Network.

I really have no idea what an embedded Premium service is, so it's hard to argue about. But I'm pretty sure you don't either.

You can take an 8 Megapixal Video and stream directly to the internet.

Uh, not at the upload speeds I hit using 3G. Also I'm not sure 8 MP video is a thing; isn't video quality measured by resolution and compression? 720p video uses 0.92 MP

Sprint is extending the $10 Premium Data Add-On to all smartphone activations and upgrades beginning 1/30/11!

Why do you have an exclamation mark there? That's not good news. 'hey guys, super news, we're raising your rent 14% next month!'

Rather than imposing limits and overage charges on data plans for wireless phones as competitors have done, Sprint is extending the $10 Premium Data Add-on to all smartphone activations and upgrades beginning 1/30/11.

Sweet molasses, I just got a wicked case of deja vu. No, wait you actually just said the second half of that statement in the previous sentence. Glad you decided to take another stab at it in a more somber tone. And, yes, instead of waiting to see if I could possibly ever go over the 5GB allotment that doesn't apply to me anyway (hint: I'm never going to use 5GB in a month while I still have wired internet) you decided to preemptively charge a $10 overage fee every single month. Now that's service!

The $10 add-on is necessary on smartphones because these devices on average use 10x more data than an average feature phone.

Here's an advanced math lesson for you. 10 * unlimited = unlimited. If you can't handle some folks calling your bluff on an unlimited plan, maybe you shouldn't be selling it to them. Also, I've averaged 7.6 MB of data use per day over the past 6 months with a smart phone. Lets ignore how far under INFINITE MB that is, and look at how much less than the 170.6MB per day a feature phone would have to use to hit the 5GB cap. It's 22.26 TIMES LESS data than a feature phone is allowed to use, not ten times more.

This Premium Data pack is for unlimited data usage while in 3G/4G Sprint network and also for the rich data experience that smartphones provide whether in 3G or 4G Sprint network.

I'm tempted to declare this nonsense and move on, but lets break it down. 'Premium data is for unlimited data usage and rich data experience.' Again, I'm not sure what rich data usage is or how it's different, but given the option I'd pick unlimited over rich. And I already had unlimited without the premium pack.

This $10.00 Premium Data Pack ensure maximum utilization of all the features on smartphones.

Nope. Standing over my shoulder and making sure I open every app installed (even those crap apps I can't uninstall) would ensure maximum utilization of features.

Anyway, I'm getting tired of making the same point over and over again, so I'll probably just drop it. The machine wins. But come on, you have to admit that selling a more unlimited data plan is as silly as extra virgin olive oil.

Success?

2011-01-26T11:47:00.001-08:00

Thank you for your reply.

As a smartphone user, Sprint provides you with the best overall value
and an unlimited Premium Data experience over the Sprint network for
just $10 per month. Together with our Everything Data Plans with Any
Mobile, Anytime starting at $69.99, you can save up to $40 a month
compared to our leading competitors.

With Premium Data, you can fully engage in all the advanced features of
your smartphone without the worry of exceeding data usage caps while on
the Sprint network. This Premium Data pack is for unlimited data usage
while in 3G/4G Sprint network and also for the rich data experience that
smartphones provide whether in 3G or 4G Sprint network. This $10.00
Premium Data Pack ensure maximum utilization of all the features on
smartphones.

I have also forwarded your feedback regarding the publication to the
appropriate department so that they can look into this matter.

Thank you again for contacting us.

Sincerely,
Ronald L
Sprint

Lets See If That Does It.

2011-01-26T06:37:00.000-08:00

Michael,
It's good to know that the plan descriptions on the Sprint web site are accurate, thanks. However that displaces the only difference I could discern between the normal data plan and the premium data plan. Premium data does not refer to 4G and it does not refer to unlimited usage caps. I'm going to assume it does not refer to reduced latency or packet loss. So I'm at a loss as to how this offering is value added.

Maybe this discrepancy is grammar based. I've been assuming that premium in your usage is an adjective describing the data available to my device. However, since I can detect no additional value an adjective would convey, it sounds like Sprint means to use this term as a noun.

premium [ˈpriːmɪəm]
n
(Business / Commerce) an amount paid in addition to a standard rate, price, wage, etc.; bonus
adj.
Of superior quality or value: premium gasoline.

If this is the case I'd suggest rephrasing your publications and paperwork to refer to the "data premium" instead. That indicates an extra fee on top of the usual rate for unlimited data. Although the user's device is apparently the metric you're using to charge the premium so maybe "device premium" or "smartphone premium" would be more appropriate. These devices are even value added from standard feature phones, so you could use "premium device premium" if you wanted! These are all good.

I'm also curious whether sprint has taken into account all the features users can take advantage of with advanced handsets. The cameras and processors are listed as reasons that users will use more 3G bandwidth than their feature phone counterparts. However if using a larger portion of the 3G back-haul system is a rationale for a device premium, shouldn't specs that potentially lower traditional data consumption be justification for discount? I'm referring to the WiFi and WiMax radios in these devices that can ease the burden of over-taxed infrastructure by making use of high bandwidth and non-Sprint systems.

Look, I know all these semantic arguments aren't really going convince you to drop the new fee Sprint is assessing. And I'm actually fine with paying what I pay for service. (I wouldn't complain if it was less, but who would?) But I find it insulting that Sprint thinks they can raise their prices and not admit it in their advertisements. If you need more money to roll out 4G nationwide, that's fine. If you've realized that demand is increasing for smart phones and decided to charge more in response, that's fine too. But I do have a problem with selling the same service for more money while pretending that it also has more value.

There's nothing that we'll resolve over the phone that we can't resolve via written word. I know you don't make the policies or write the advertising copy. I just wanted to share some thoughts with you as a fairly well informed customer. (If it's confusing to me, my mom isn't even going to try.) This poorly clarified fee makes it harder for me to recommend Sprint for its billing transparency, though I will continue to do so based on your service and products.

If you still want to speak with me that's fine, though I feel I've articulated myself fairly well and won't have much to add. Please just mark me down in the "customer would prefer less marketing and more substance" column and send it up the ladder. There must be more consumers that feel the same way, I just wanted to mention that I agree.

Thanks for your time,

Jeadly

More Confusing.

2011-01-26T04:51:00.000-08:00

Thank you for your reply.

I understand your concern regarding the data usage limitation on the 3G
network.

Please know that the unlimited 3G data is available with the plan
Everything Data Share 1500 active on the account and there is no 5GB cap
on this plan. I apologize for the breakdown in communication at the
previous interaction.

There is the 5GB data cap on the connection card plans Sprint currently
offering.

Effective January 31, 2011, the $10.00 data pack will be applicable on
all the Smartphone. Sprint is extending the $10 Premium Data Add-On to
all smartphone activations and upgrades beginning 1/30/11! Rather than
imposing limits and overage charges on data plans for wireless phones as
competitors have done, Sprint is extending the $10 Premium Data Add-on
to all smartphone activations and upgrades beginning 1/30/11. The $10
Premium Data Add-on, previously charged only on HTC EVO 4G, HTC EVO
Shift 4G and Samsung Epic 4G devices, will now apply to activations and
upgrades of all smartphones.

The $10 add-on is necessary on smartphones because these devices on
average use 10x more data than an average feature phone. Even with this
charge, Sprint customers still enjoy the best value in wireless.

I have also arranged the call for you to discuss the issue in details.
You will receive a call from Sprint toll free number (888) 211 4727 by
one of our specialists within the next 24 hours.

We value your business and appreciate the opportunity to answer your
questions. Please reply to this email or visit sprint.com if we can be
of assistance.

Sincerely,
Michael K.
Sprint

My Retort.

2011-01-25T14:18:00.000-08:00

Hi Mark,
Thanks for your reply. Your list of features seems fairly analogous to the description of three benchmarks I'd mentioned from the website.
1) fast processor 2) nice camera 3) big screen
I understand that the processor may power data-based Android applications, and the user could upload high-megapixel images, and that the screen can displayhigher resolution web video. (You also note that the EVO is capable
of outputting HDMI video, which wouldn't effect data use totals unless
you're suggesting that they could stream down HD quality video over a
3G connection.) But the presence of these abilities on a device does
not equate their constant employment.

I was pleased to see you mention that the Premium data fee would
remove the 5GB data cap when connected to the 3G network. This is indeed a difference between just "data" and "premium data". And in
fact I'd forgotten that Sprint imposes a 5GB monthly data restriction
on its phones. I can see on the "plans" portion of the sprint.com
shop page that the Wireless Broadband plans list 5GB in the "monthly
usage" column. It's a bit odd that the "Everything Data" and
"Everything Data Family" Plans don't feature a similar column. They
do however feature this text description that could be misinterpreted
as mobile data without a monthly cap.

"Our Everything Data plans give you unlimited data, messages and calls
to any mobile, anytime while on the Sprint Network."

It is not in fact $20 for unlimited data, it is an unlimited SMS, MMS,
mobile to mobile calls plan with a 5GB cap on other data. It costs
$30 for a premium plan with unlimited data, messages and mobile to
mobile calls. That was my misunderstanding of the stated details.
With these new data-hungry devices I understand not wanting
unsuspecting customers to run up against data caps which make their
features unusable, or worse to be charged overages. However I would
think opting-in to truly unlimited data would be a per user decision,
rather than blanket by phone model. This is the case with minute
plans across all phone models, with options ranging from 0 to 200 all the way through 3,000 or unlimited minutes. This would be like Sprint
only offering an unlimited minute plan on a phone that features
high-fidelity audio hardware.

If you run through the numbers a user would have to send and receive
over 170 MB of data each day on his mobile device to run afoul of the
(admittedly generous) 5GB cap. While this may be feasible on phones streaming 720p video, I think it's unfair to assume all your customers
are amateur videographers. I've attached the graph of my personal
data experience which includes an EVO 4G for all months and a Hero
from June through November, replaced by an Epic 4G in December. As
you can see, we have trouble cracking 350 MB across two devices most months. This is embarrassingly far from our 10GB limit and I promise
to try harder in the future.I understand from the footnote that these data do not include
transactions conducted through the Clearwire WiMax network, but I can
assure you that those would be minimal additions. I usually only
enable my 4G radio when in DC or Baltimore to run the FCC speed test
application. Frankly the fact that 4G data isn't included leads me to
postulate that Sprint is unable to track 4G usage. It's strange to
think, but that seems like a more plausible reason to coerce me into
an unlimited data tier than worries about my 1GHz processor and 5MP
camera conspiring against my historical usage trends.

I guess from a consumer perspective I'd appreciate if you would
highlight the 5GB cap on normal data plans and truly unlimited data
usage for smartphones on the premium data plan. To market something
as limitless when in fact it has clearly set limitations dilutes an
offering that actually delivers on the same promises.

A Reply From Sprint.

2011-01-25T14:17:00.000-08:00

Thank you for your reply.

I understand your concern regarding the $10 Premium Data Fee with
smartphones.

HTC Evo & Samsung Epic ’s features are custom made for data-loving
customers. These data-rich features are available to Samrtphones
customers regardless if they are in a 3G or 4G network. This will remove
the 5GB data cap when you are on the 3G network. Plus faster data speeds
if you live in or travel to one of the available 4G markets.

“3G Customers benefit just as much as 4G users when purchasing the HTC
EVO with the $10 Premium Data Fee. The embedded Premium Services allow
you to do more than ever before within the 3G Network. You can take an 8
Megapixal Video and stream directly to the internet, or stream a feature
length film to your HD TV. You can perform complex video conferencing
for yourself or a group. It takes social media to a whole new level.”

With Premium Data, you can fully engage in all the advanced features on
your HTC EVO Epic phones without the worry of exceeding data usage caps
while on the Sprint network, including:

* 1GHz Snapdragon processor improves all aspects of the device
performance: applications will launch faster, navigating on the device
is quicker; the multimedia experience gives you real-time communication.

* Dual cameras: An 8 megapixel primary camera with flash; and a video
camera great for streaming. Its HDMI capabilities allow you to record
and output HD-quality video to your HD-capable TV.

* 4.3'' display, one of the largest available on a smart phone,
maximizes your web browsing and video watching experience.

I have also arranged a call for further clarifications. One of our
representatives will call you within the next 48 hours from Sprint toll
free number (888) 211 4727.

We value your business and appreciate the opportunity to answer your
questions. Please reply to this email or visit sprint.com if we can be
of assistance.

Sincerely,
Marc N.
Sprint

Let Me Lay This Out For You.

2011-01-25T06:30:00.000-08:00

Hi John,
I had just wrote up some thoughts on the general marketing of Sprint's
smartphone "Premium" charge while looking at various account details
today. I found two forms on the site that wouldn't process and
decided to punt instead of searching around for another contact page.
If you could pass along the following comments to someone who deals
with data plans or marketing or smartphones, I'd be very appreciative.
Thanks for your help,
Jeadly

----

I'm looking at the "analyze my account" page and understand everything
listed. However I would like to share some thoughts on the "Premium
Data" section listed after "data" and "4G" items. I agreed to the $10
additional data fee on my current phone in recognition of the
additional radio and 4G-like service it is able to take advantage of.
To now change that stance and say that 4G data is free, but that there
is some other ethereal premium data service, is disingenuous I feel.
There is in fact nothing "premium" about the data services I am
consuming, if not for their higher speeds due to an occasional 4G
connection. In reality you have classed my device as a
high-data-consumption device and are charging more because I am more
likely to use large amounts of data access. It is a misnomer to term
this segment "Premium" data consumers, when in fact it refers to an
amount of data. The crux of the issue is that you are selling
"unlimited" data access (an offering which keeps me subscribing to
Sprint) and then decide that certain devices need to pay for "more
unlimited" data access. This is, if you will excuse so crude a
simile, like charging fat people more for the buffet.

This is the help text that is displayed when I click on the "Premium
Data" section mentioned at the beginning:
"This phone can do it all and then some. Because we've boosted your
data experience with this phone's amazing services and features,
you'll need this add-on. Enjoy:
A wicked fast processor to make your apps run smoother and faster on
our Sprint 3G and 4G network
Top quality media experience with oversized screen, high resolution
video and HD recording
High-quality pics to snap and share with friends and family"

This makes little sense and is very offputting. My "data experience"
remains unchanged from my last phone, aside from the WiMax radio,
which is apparently not referred to in premium data. All the items
listed in this section are hardware benchmarks that have the potential
to create large files and make copious use of data. That is, a larger
data amount. I have paid a premium for a new device which connects to
the same data service.

I'm not trying to tell you that it's wrong for smart phone users to
pay more for data service than dumb phone users. I'm saying you
should be more upfront in the plan designations you use. Don't sell
me an unlimited data plan for $25 and then add a mysterious $10
"premium" fee for using more unlimited data. (it would make more
sense if that $10 made the unlimited data faster) If you must, sell
unlimited data for $25 to dumb phones and $35 for smart phones.
That's much less confusing about what we're paying for and what we're
getting. Of course I'd much rather see you disclose the limits that
are in place, either physically or based on policy. If you want users
to pay more when they pass 500 MB per month, say so. And be honest
about the average speeds users can expect, not the theoretical
laboritory speeds that will never happen in practice. I think your
customers will respond much more positively to frank disclosure and
respectful claims of capability than snappy text about "wicked fast
services", infinite resources and intangible premium upgrades.

Contact.

2011-01-25T06:00:00.000-08:00

Thank you for contacting Sprint. I am happy to assist you in regards to
your feedback.

I understand your concern about the character limitation in the email
box. You may reply to this email with the details of your concern and
let me assure you also that there will be no character limitation in
reply to this email.

In order to best resolve your issue, a Sprint Care Representative would
like to speak with you personally. You will receive a call from us
within 48 hours at: XXX-XXX-XXXX.

If there is a different number you prefer we call, please reply to this
email. We are looking forward to speaking with you and addressing your
concerns.

We value your business and appreciate the opportunity to answer your
questions. Please reply to this email or visit sprint.com if we can be
of assistance.

Sincerely,
John C.
Sprint

Feedback for Sprint.

2011-01-25T05:51:00.001-08:00

Sprint recently decided that the extra $10 fee I'm paying for my 4G phone is not actually for 4G service. It's "Premium data" service. Which is confusing to me since the data is no different than it has always been, with the exception of 4G. I wrote up my thoughts in a, I think, wildly composed and respectful format and attempted to submit them for someone to read. It didn't work. I've found two feedback forms on their site, neither of which will accept my text. One of them says there are illegal characters, and the other has a character limit of 1200. So while I wait for them to answer my feedback about an actual email address to contact I figured I'd put it up here.

>> Form: Ask A Question-Manage
>> Topic: General Inquiry
>> SUB Topic: General Inquiry
>> =============================================================
>> Original Question:
>> Question: I wish to submit feedback that is greater than 1200
> characters
>> in length. Is there a contact email address on this site that is not
> a
>> limited web form?
>> =============================================================

So, I guess I haven't posted in a while.

2010-11-04T07:35:00.001-07:00

And there's a reason for that. Buzz steals all my snark, and there's none left for you. I know, it sucks. But there it is. Here's a second hand whiff, maybe you'll get a contact high. Also, I've had three travel mugs of coffee in the last three and a half hours. Is that too much? I think that's too much. My brain thinks that's too much. Screw him, I'm gonna get some coffee.

LW - Google Reader - Public

"You know the drill—I, for one, welcome our new female snake-Jesus overlords"

Female Boa constrictor reproduces without help from males - Boing Boing
There is, perhaps, nothing terribly shocking about a female snake, placed in an enclosure with four male snakes, giving birth to two litters of baby snakes. But what if those babies carry only their mother's genetic material? Parthenogenesis—breeding without the, you know, breeding—has been documented in only a small handful of vertebrate species, but it does happen. However, usually, it take...

RS - Those must have been some ugly snake dudes if she decided to go solo.Nov 3

KJ - I wonder if these snakes are sterile, like mules are supposed to be...Nov 3

LW - except mules are a cross between two species, which is why they are sterile. these are only half of one species ;-) although with that weird WW sex chromosome, i don't think they count as male OR female.8:46 am

Jeadly - Schrödinger's snake would be way more complicated than his cat. There could be a live snake, a dead snake, or a box with infinite snakes... Also, I am less okay with a box of snakes than cats.8:51 am

KJ - Just don't let those infinite snakes out of the box in Heisenberg's house. Then you'd have a REALLY big problem! :-P8:54 am

RS - I don't know what's worse, that you guys are talking about nerdy subjects like Shrodinger and Heisenberg, or that I'm fully aware of the references.8:56 am

LW - k - haha, funny.
r - we're all nerds, get over it.9:08 am

Jeadly - Crap, now I'm trying to decide if I'd rather know where a snake is or which way it's lunging.9:09 am

KJ - Don't worry about it. Just follow Pauli's advice stay off the ground floor. They'll be there first before coming upstairs. Unless of course, the snakes get excited and jump up to the next floor. But chances are they won't be there long...9:27 am

KJ- Excuse me, Hund's advice...9:29 am

Jeadly - I like Pauli's reassurance better; there can't possibly be infinite snakes in your house. We're talking like a million or two - max... Unless there's some kind of photon snakes, which I spose is pretty reasonable considering the context. Damn.9:48 am

LW - uh, i think this is getting a little out of hand.10:08 am

Jeadly - What part of infinite self-fertilizing unobservable light-snakes is "out of hand"?

Don't Put That In Your Mouth.

2010-07-02T09:48:00.002-07:00

I read the Food Inc book last year and just finished the movie recently. Its really hard not to feel motivated to change the system and simultaneously helpless to do so.

Although it occurs to me that one of the easiest ways to change the top food producing companies is to shop at Walmart. If Walmart's customers demand responsible organic food, then Walmart will demand the same of its suppliers. And even the largest GMO grower in the world can't afford to ignore Walmart.

One of the biggest messages to take home here is that you need to pay more for your food.

Cut the Crap!

2010-05-12T09:48:00.000-07:00

Check this business out:

I just went by the Quiznos (Not the good one, that's closed. The one that seems to survive only by under-staffing with employees that work exclusively in the human equivalent of 7 inch vinyl played at 33 RPM.) to use my two for one coupon when this nifty little bag caught my eye at the register. Its a smaller sized tote bag that nicely fits two subs without exce

ssive wiggle room. Now, I'm not normally one for impulse purchases, but I've thought on numerous occasions that the plastic bag they give me for a sandwich is fleetingly useful at best. Though I hesitate to eschew a bag altogether because, frankly, their subs are known to leak; especially since they've taken to not wrapping them but sliding a small paper bag over the length. So BAM! for 99 cents I've got myself a reusable sammich bag, I won't feel bad about throwing out plastic containers 10 minutes old, and my normal totes won't get all juiced up inside. Win-freaking-win.

Oh, also I get a free soda every time I bring it back to Quiznos. So there's that for you cynics with your cynicism and your loathing. How do you live with yourselves?

Update: I'm not trying to say that Quizno's is the best company in the world or anything, but at least they made an effort. That said, I think I may need to smack someone with a pickled herring. In the course of trying to find official publication of the reusable sack program I found this nugget on the "Be Green" Quizno's site:

If you can't read the tiny asterisk footnote on "biodegradable" and "compostable" let me reprint it so the hilarity isn't lost.

"Not biodegradable in a landfill. Not compostable in a home compost pile or device. Requires special facilities which may not exist in your area."

What. The. Hell. How did you geniuses come up with a paper material that will not break down in the two most likely places it'll wind up? Its paper for god's sake!

Making the Most Out of a Bad Situation.

2010-05-11T05:23:00.001-07:00

I got an update from GoDaddy in the emails today. Apparently it isn't all champaign and booby commercials over there.

Dear [HAPLESS CUSTOMER],

On July 1, 2010, VeriSign®, the registry for .COM and .NET, will increase prices – .COM will go up 7%, and .NET by 10%.

The increase will be passed to registrars like Go Daddy and then, unfortunately, to consumers like you.

As of July 1, we will be forced to raise registration and renewal* prices for these two popular top-level domains.

If you wish to avoid this price increase, you can renew your domain names by June 30 and add another year to your current expiration dates. You have the option to register or renew for multiple years and lock in long-term savings. Of course, should you have any questions, please give us a call at 1-480-505-8821.

Thanks as always for being a Go Daddy customer.

Sincerely,

Bob Parsons

CEO and Founder

GoDaddy.com

Oh no, Bob! I can't believe that they're doing this to you! Of course I agree that you should also raise your prices to make up for an arbitrary supplier cash demand. Its almost extortion! Shameful! I mean, I bet your profit margins are razor thin as it is; I've been seeing less and less of your ridiculous, condescending and mildly offensive advertisements on the telio-vision. Hmmm... let me see if I can find some contact information for Verisign and ream them out good for what they're doing to you.

https://investor.verisign.com/releasedetail.cfm?releaseid=431292

Oh. I see. They're raising prices to fortify, scale and secure a global infrastructure that's been 100% operational for the last 11 years. That's kinda impressive actually. What do you do again? Oh, yeah you're a middle man, taking a cut off the top for something that I could do myself fairly easily if not for the system you've positioned yourself to exploit. They also list the price increases they'll be instituting. .COM domains will rise from $6.86 to $7.34. A difference of 48 cents, or 6.99%. And .NET domains will go from $4.23 to $4.65; or 42 cents and 9.92%. Looks like your story adds up just fine.

Hang on a second... What increases will be "unfortunately" passed to consumers like me? (Consumers like me? I'm a consumer like me!) You didn't mention the changes in your rates specifically, so should I assume you'll just bump the renewal by 48 and 42 cents appropriately, like any trustworthy intermediary would? (your prices already seem fairly arbitrary; it'd be nice to see a break-down of the various fees, taxes, charges and over-charges like the phone companies are nice enough to mail me) Or maybe you mean that we'll see 7 and 10 percent changes in the prices we already pay. Lets see, before the 12 cent ICANN fee you'll renew my .COM domain for one year at 9.82, and you'll give me my .NET domain for 9.69 a year.

I really appreciate the special pricing by the way, I must be one of your best bros for you to lower them from the 10.69 and 12.99 normal rates for no apparent reason at all. Lets not even mention the prospect of you raising these normal rates by 7 and 10%. (Also, 13 dollars? You're charging 13 dollars for something that costs you $4.30? No wonder you can pay a million dollars to show people chimps jumping on trashcans.)

Okay, so if you raised your prices (and your markup) by the percents you mentioned (which I'm sure you wouldn't) .COM's would go up to 10.80, or 98 cents more and .NET would hit 10.65, 96 cents more expensive per year. Why in the world would you want to use someone else's price change to justify tagging your customers for an extra 50 cents per domain per year when you are making absolutely no changes to service and it costs you literally nothing?

GoDaddy Regisrar Info

Oh, you passed 36 million registered domains this year and it looks like over 3/4 of them are .COM and .NET variety. So +3/4 * 36,100,000 is around 28,000,000 times 50 cents is FOURTEEN MILLION DOLLARS you could collect from your loyal customers every year while blaming the actual service provider and not contributing anything else yourself.

You've got to hand it to them, those weasels certainly are making the most out of an unfortunate rate hike. At best they're using the upcoming increase to drive long-term sales now, before the crushing hike. I really wish I could rent out Jon Stuart's "GO FUCK YOURSELVES" dancers, but taking my business elsewhere might have to make due in this case. I've had this article bookmarked since February maybe now I'll actually sit down and do it.

http://smarterware.org/5117/how-to-ditch-godaddy-redux

Wasn't the Web Always Social? (now we just know people's names)

2010-04-22T09:51:00.001-07:00

So facebook is launching new features. Too bad I never really bothered to learn the old features, that might make it harder to appreciate these. The jist I get so far is that sites can add a little 'like' Facebook button so that people can click on it and it gets added to their Facebook 'feed' and shared with their friends. Okay, that seems a lot like all the other sharing buttons that showed up on "web 2.0" (shudder) sites a while ago. You know: digg, stumbleupon, twitter, technorati, del.icio.us... there's more.

There's probably more to it than just pasting another share button on every site out there. I think I read that you can see a list of items on the site that your friend liked. Okay. Forgive my lack of excitement. This smacks of the same feeling I got when Apple announced its new iAd platform recently. GREAT, tremendous, revolutionary new features... for companies, but really not much change or improvement on business as usual for the users they're excited about leveraging.

I guess maybe that's not true. For people who use Facebook to share articles and web pages with their friends, this is a streamlined improvement over copying the url, opening a tab for facebook and pasting the link in their stream. But for the rest of us it seems like just another button littering the edges of every post. (at least on sites that add it)

I wonder why every site needs to code Facebook integration for this type of interaction. Its the user who wants to connect Facebook with the site, why can't they add something (maybe a plugin) to their browser that enables this for any site they're viewing. Then they wouldn't be at a loss when they happen across a site that hasn't rewritten its code to accommodate Facebook. This would also enable users to choose any service they want to share items of import with their followers; it could be a blog, maybe a twitter, a google reader stream, whatever they want. And we wouldn't need to add 200 little thumbnail logos everywhere.

But maybe that's my problem with how Facebook (or twitter) is approaching the "social web" to begin with. They obviously envision themselves as the central hub around which all information is traded. They can do this because we've all given them our social maps and they haven't given us a way to take them back (or somewhere else) so we stay. But the Internet isn't a wheel in which all spokes lead to Facebook; its more like a "web" where people and sites interact directly or through various proxies. There's no need to send everything back to a central repository.

Sometimes it seems like some people (and companies) forget that there is an Internet underneath all these social sites. They rush to create their pages and claim space on Facebook's internet, forgetting that they own real URLs and real websites that don't need to hook into Facebook. You could send an email to your friend instead of a FB message. You could use one of hundreds of instant messaging clients instead of Facebook's. You could share your 'status' and 'feed' updates via RSS, or Atom on countless publishing platforms instead of Facebook and Twitter that are dominating media coverage.

In fact, the greatest single impetus for joining Facebook is to interact with the people on Facebook. They've introduced a lot of people to useful communication concepts but kept them in a subset of the real system. A subset where we all have to be on the same site to exchange information with each other and users on a different site are out of the loop. That's great for its users, as long as everyone they want to interact with keeps joining, but its really great for growing Facebook.

This is coming across as awfully anti-Facebook, which I'm not. It is a useful-looking site for a variety of users and aggregates Facebook data very nicely. I am against everyone in the world using, or needing to use Facebook. It seems very reasonable to me that I could use one site on the Internet, where I have a profile and a feed etc, to interact with the profiles of contacts at Facebook, sharing articles, commenting on stati, sending messages and invites, whatever else you kids do on the Facebook.

It seems reasonable because that's how the rest of the internet works. You can send email from yahoo to earthlink or aol or bob'semail.com and it works just fine because they all conform to a public standard. Its not some API that links back to one giant database owned by a single company. Imagine how amazing it would be for Facebook's users if suddenly everyone using a social platform could communicate. It would be as important as connecting together telephone exchanges around the world. But as far as I can see Facebook is not interested in improving their users' experience in a way that would reduce the rate of new inductees funneling in. They're more focused on developing an API that channels social information that's happening on the Internet into their own private system.

So this is a bit of a plea, no you don't have to stop using Facebook if you love it so much. Just be aware of what's really going on behind the scenes. Technology is in the state it is today because of diversity, competition, interoperability and consumer choice. I'm wary of a company who strives for a captive user base. Make no mistake the move to place a Facebook tentacle on every website is a land grab. They acknowledge that their users frequent other sites to read and interact, but they want a way to bring it all back home to their own constantly hungry data collection centers. So far they haven't decided to monetize this information in truly userous ways, but some day they will and you'll discover that data you thought was yours is actually theirs.

Zuckerberg: “We Are Building A Web Where The Default Is Social”

More Options is More Confusing.

2010-04-07T04:14:00.000-07:00

And the app store fragmentation continues. I imagine as the platform splinters apple will have a harder time holding everything together as it works now. I've felt the sting of alienation as their focus moved swiftly past my year old device when operating systems and hardware changed. Apps take advantage of microphones and bluetooth and cameras, things that my hardware was now suddenly lacking; somehow I didn't miss them when I bought it.

Apple's own prolific gadget releases are at odds with the concept of a simple computer that just plain works great. Each release is billed as the GREATEST THING EVER, and so it is. Until 6 months from now when the next GTE comes out and the people who want a simple experience that just plain works need to get that one.

It will be more complicated to write a piece of software that runs on all these different devices; moreso when apple releases iPhone 4 and iPad 2. And either publishers will put in more work and charge everyone more money (plus apple's 30% slice), or they'll leave behind the slackers who haven't upgraded their device in the last 8 months. The article is right, 99 cents seems an appropriate price for an "app"; maybe even $1.99. No sweat to shrug off if it was an ill advised purchase. But when you're pushing 10 or 15 bucks, that my friend is a full blown program. Frankly I'd rather have real programs on a real computer; though ironically enough most of my real computer software is open source. Real programs tend to be especially pricey if you're going to get the next GTE and have to re-buy all the apps that get re-released for it.

I was shocked at how much more cash I gave apple after I bought my iPod touch. They make it so easy and gratifying to fork over time and time again. You probably won't notice for 6 months, but iPad buyers prepare to spend as much on apps and media as you did for your device, possibly much, much more. And make sure to relish the early adopter rush and special sparkle your iPad has right now, because I promise apple is doing its best to wash it away.

Editorial: iPad app prices are out of control and will kill us all

(Now) Open Letter to Comcast (douche-bags)

2010-01-14T15:53:00.000-08:00

See what you made me do Comcast? You made me start blagging again. Your fault.

Here's the "Customer Feedback" I spent about 40 minutes trying to submit and actually had to have a "Chat Representative" tell me how to find. (just so you know, it's here: http://www.comcast.com/customers/feedback/default.cspx ) You mofoes better go take some website structure design classes or something.

I am furious after trying to use your website and phone lines to lodge a complaint about your digital cable transition. I was angry when I turned on my tv and was informed that I would no longer receive 80% of the channels I'm paying (too much) for. But after viewing the offerings on your website I am irate. It is very clear that this is a deliberate effort to bilk your customers out more money per month. Where is the limited basic cable (analog) offering that I'm now receiving; no matter how many times more my bill is than its value? This service is worth no more than $15 a month, and less in many markets. How many customers do you suppose will keep paying you three or four times more than your services are worth to them?

I understand what DTV is and why some people may value it over analog sources. I don't want another comcast box, on demand programming or HD channels. I don't want your remote or your DVRs. I want the same lower quality, lower overhead format of the channels I've been paying you to convey for years. You are a conduit, not a hardware vendor. This ploy of forcing your customers to become more entwined and controlled by your vertical monopoly will result in demonstrable backlash. It will start here. I will degrade my service to limited cable or I will cancel it completely. I was paying you for analog signal. If I'd wanted digital TV you wouldn't have had a customer, that stuff is floating all around us. Free as air. Lyman out.

Comcast is very lucky to not be a tenant in my building. Cause I'm pretty sure I'd be throwing tennis balls at his windows and leaving bags of poop in front of the door.

Update:

So I forgot to include the full text of the message displayed on my tv screen for those of you who can't read small words, click on images, or are actually blind. (what? screen readers do text, not images. At least not images without alt tags, ie: all of mine.)

We have removed features from your service.
We think your shit is too old.
Now you have to pay us $5 for every tv you have. Every month.
We own your ass, bitch.

Musical Dealers.

2009-07-01T05:58:00.000-07:00

So I took my car in to the dealer yesterday like a chump. But hey, this is the first dime I've actually given to them so all those free rental cars and carwashes finally paid off. I figure one good Acura check-up now that my car is out of warranty might be judicious. Then I won't feel quite so neglectful when I never take him back for actual service.

Anyway, I roll up at 7 and the Acura signs are all gone and there's a buncha Nissans in the lot. Doesn't seem promising and no one mentioned that they'd turned into a Nissan dealer when I'd made my appointment. Odd, but then I noticed a sheet of paper taped to the door that said Acura had moved down the street. Okayyy...

So I drop off my car at this obviously not new building that has Acura signs draped on it. Odd. But my curiosity is well satiated by street view which shows this location as a Chevy / Oldsmobile. Ohh... sssssoooory! That might be a bit of a sore spot, huh? Although I can't find anything about Chevy Chase Chevrolet actually closing, there's no web site about them and they're definitely not in this building any more.

Anyone know if this is standard operating procedure for dealers? Moving locations trivial distances with no warning? I guess the new building is bigger but it seems like a lot of overhead. Also the old place looked like somewhere you might go to buy a car. This storefront looks like an old department store that accidentally got a shipment of cars instead of mannequins.

Firmwarez

2009-06-18T04:17:00.000-07:00

So the iPhone 3.0 OS rolled out yesterday and despite my many protestations I've come to accept that its a necessary upgrade. I'm not gonna get much from many of the features, like MMS, voice memos, internet tethering (although none of you will see that one either), stereo bluetooth, or "find my iphone". I mostly wanted the update so I can continue to pay Apple and developers for apps to run on my iPod touch. Never you mind that I already paid them $20 to update my fresh out-of-the-box device with a current OS; charging customers for the privilege of giving you money doesn't seem like a very good strategy. But I digress.

I really wanted to point out a feature that I wasn't very pumped up about till about 5 minutes ago. The Spotlight Search. I've been pretty annoyed with apple's system for organizing apps on the iphone, which basically consists of one list that stretches for as many pages as is necessary to show all the icons. You can drag them around, but its pretty much a pain and they don't stay sorted well as new apps are purchased. But now with search I can type in the first few letters of the app I want and up it pops. Pretty nice actually, considering its fixing such a stupid problem.

UpdateHoly crap, it searches through your music too! No more scrolling through the alphabet like a sucker!

Just Another Day At Work.

2009-06-03T05:02:00.001-07:00

You ever get the feeling that the White House is just one big-ass party that you'll never be invited to? Everyone knows the best house parties always wind up with wild exotic animals roaming the grounds and dudes with guns posing manlyly.

One Map To Rule Them All.

2009-05-27T05:37:00.000-07:00

So this is pretty sweet. About a year ago I was in the Caribbean. It was nice. Then sometime after I got back Google launched something called "Map Maker". Its basically a copy of Google maps that people can edit in certain regions, wiki-style. One of those not mapped was Grand Cayman, which I had limited but first-hand knowledge of. So I went to town making little roads and buildings, trying to match up the satellite image with my memory and photos I'd taken. After a little searching I even found a scanned tourist map of the area that told me road names and points of interest. I digitized as much as made sense and promptly forgot about it. My knowledge was pretty much exhausted after 21.9 km of roads and 22 business listings, hey, I was only there for a few hours.

As of today, my account is 337 days old and Google is announcing that they're rolling Map Maker changes into real Google Maps for those newly updated areas.

Google LatLong: Map Maker Graduation: Part II

A quick comparison shows that, yup, maps looks pretty much the same as the user generated map Maker version. But more importantly is how much detail is found on Grand Cayman now. There was literally nothing there when I started. (actually the island polygon was .5 km west of the satellite imagery) And random people with personal experience filled in the gaps. Other people helped with formatting and bam, all of a sudden there's a useful reference tool online.

Map Maker

I guess I find this interesting because its what I though they were going for when they started the project and it actually worked. To try crowd sourcing obscure information. People don't really want compensation, they just want to collaborate, and maybe hope that people who know something they don't will share too.

Official Mix.

2009-05-26T16:43:00.000-07:00

Well, I ordered a martini in a fancy-pants restaurant over the weekend. And, very surprisingly, it tasted pretty much like what I've been making in my apartment. I mean, no I don't suppose I have the attunement to taste subtle differences yet, but me throwing gin and vermouth on ice is apparently pretty darn close to the real recipe. I'd also kinda thought that it might taste a bit better with higher quality materials; notsomuch. Pretty much the only thing that makes martinis taste good is more martinis.

Also, I dislike having to specify what kind of martini I want. If you walk into a hardware and ask for a claw hammer, they shouldn't ask if you want it made out of clay and flavored like strawberries. I said martini, not vodka martini, not appletini, not chocofusion-tini. That means gin and olives, since I didn't mention a twist. I know it tastes terrible but I'm developing a skill over here.

What Are You Still Talking About, Willis?

2009-05-15T07:20:00.000-07:00

I rarely agree with Farhad. In fact, I normally vehemently disagree with him. But I always say its better to be loved than hated, but better to be hated than ignored. He's got readers and is generating a response so I guess he's doing something right. Most recently he seems to suggest that my tech savvy should be keeping me up at night.

No, not spending the wee hours in pointless IRC debates. He thinks I'm breaking the unspoken social contract of the internets by not loading ads that content providers have so lovingly chosen for me. I'm sorry, I meant to say "spread in a haphazard manner like bear traps covered with feces". Yeah, I don't think much about most of these ads.

The argument goes that since some online publications rely on advertising revenue to cover their costs, people using ad-blocking plug-ins, himself included, are like airline passengers taking fuel out of the 747 they intend to fly on. That is, it is unethical to block ads on pages you visit. Bull.

Firstly the author's metaphor doesn't really fly. We're not passengers siphoning fuel out of the plane, Slate is asking all the passengers who board to give them some fuel. There's a difference between stealing and not donating. If fees were mandatory there would be a pay wall.

Second, by his logic, not only are we unethical if we don't load the ads, Slate doesn't get paid if we don't click on the ads too. So we must all read and click on ads even if we are not interested. And having advertisers pay for click-throughs if we don't intend to buy anything isn't ethical either, so we all have to buy anything that advertises on a web page we read. (I don't have any paid advertising, although there is a store link right over there! ---->)

Farhad seems to blame us for not wanting to be constantly assailed and only briefly mentions (too little too late in my view) the concept of making advertising better as opposed to more invasive. As consumers have more control over their media and more options for gathering information advertisers need to find a way to make their messages not just "not annoying" but desirable.

There is a difference between tolerating advertising and seeking it out. Targeting messages is a good first step, but as algorithms progress I may end up seeing a sea of advertisements that are equally applicable. Which, if we're not careful, could lead to another 'most annoying ad' contest. The trick is to make consumers want to see your advertisement. If an ad man can make me back my Tivo up to see his message he's done his job. The rest is just filler.

An ethical proposal for Firefox's popular ad-removal tool. - By Farhad Manjoo - Slate Magazine

Ball Status.

2009-05-15T06:08:00.001-07:00

I just thought you'd want to know how my balls are doing today. The Reese's foil ball is coming along nicely, although I've finished the bag. Yes, that's nearly all the foil wrappers from a large bag of mini Reece's cups. Wider than a quarter, but somehow I think you'd be unimpressed if you saw how much candy I had to eat. Also a little depressing when compared to my Klondike bar foil ball which consists of the wrapper from a single Klondike bar. The grand experiment will continue when I get my hands on some more raw materials. Please send bags of mini Reese's cups to jeadly at DailyPlacebo.com. Donations are not tax deductible.

You're Training Who For What?

2009-05-14T09:55:00.000-07:00

So I was never in the Boy Scouts. I never earned a merit badge, but I can tie some knots and I could start a fire if I needed to. So while I don't think enrollment is an essential, I certainly don't think its a harmful childhood activity.

But I just learned about the "Explorers" and I've got a pretty healthy case of the heeby jeebies. Essentially, its training 13.5 - 18 year olds, at least C students, to be border patrol agents. You know basic skills like infiltrating hazardous areas, chasing down illegal immigrants, or clearing an alley of gun-toting Arabs. “Before it was more about the basics,” said Johnny Longoria, a Border Patrol agent here. “But now our emphasis is on terrorism, illegal entry, drugs and human smuggling.” I don't know how I made it out of adolescence without these kinds of exercises.

Since the attacks of Sept. 11, 2001..., many posts have taken on an emphasis of fighting terrorism and other less conventional threats.

So because of something that happened when these kids were 6 years old they're being trained in anti-terrorism classes? I mean I guess its good these kids are finding a positive outlet for their semi-disturbing tendencies, but something deep inside me objects to a culture that lays such fear and responsibility on its youth. This isn't Sparta, we don't need to train warrior children. We revere our armed services because they make sacrifices to protect us; we don't all need to be trained in subduing combatants.

I've been a little bit shaky with the JROTC, but I'm all for it compared to this. Explorers Posts are basically individually managed cells of children being trained by local law enforcement, or whoever. They seem to make the point that this training could be useful if a school shooting were to occur but I'm inclined to believe that they probably wouldn't be armed on a typical school day. So unless the "Bruce Willis in Die Hard" course is part of the standard curriculum you're just teaching more kids how to operate weapons and clear a building. Don't officers usually have psych evaluations and stuff?

So basically we're projecting our fear and xenophobia, furthering the dissolution of American childhood and sanctioning escalation of violence and the use of maximal force.

“Put him on his face and put a knee in his back,” a Border Patrol agent explained. “I guarantee that he’ll shut up.”

I think "being a true blooded American" means something different in the Southwest.

Explorer-Scouts Train in Post-9/11 Law Enforcement Methods - NYTimes.com

Holy Moses.

2009-05-11T14:58:00.000-07:00

Uh, yeah, that's just gin and olives. I think; I can't really taste the olives yet. I'm still not sure what the hell vermouth is, but I don't think its getting the job done. Maybe I should take the suggesion of pre-freezing your bar ware more seriously. But nonetheless, its 5 o'clock, Martini time!

Deano

Tired Of Under Scrambled Eggs.

2009-04-25T07:03:00.000-07:00

Oh yes, I went there.

This Banking Stuff Is Out Of Hand.

2009-04-24T08:57:00.001-07:00

So I'm finished paying off my car this weekend. Which I thought was a good thing. Apparently my bank thinks that's a bad thing. I've had an account with them for 7 years and have never paid a fee for my checking account. Which is why I was surprised to find an 8 dollar monthly fee when I checked my account today. Apparently some time in the past two years they changed up all their rules and now have a bunch of different checking account levels. I don't care, I mostly just want somewhere for my paychecks to land before they get cut up and fed to various other entities. And the reason I could not care for so long was that if your accounts and loans totaled more than $10,000, they waived this $8 fee for swankified checking, or whatever its called. Now that I've paid back the loan, I no longer get a free ride. I'm pretty sure I don't use any of the features of this value added-status (aside from the .05% higher APY, woohoo!) so I called them up to see if I needed to downgrade or what, cause there's no damn way I'm paying you to hold my money.

Turns out there's another route into the gratis high-roller's checking club. You need to have direct depost, E-statements, and online bill pay enabled and they'll waive the monthly fee. Okay, I already do the first two cause I want less paper and I haven't done bill pay because it seems like adding a paper transaction for things I already do electronically. But they're sending the paper to someone else, so what do I care? (I actually hope that they can take care of most of these things electronically too) Whatever, at first glance this does seem marginally easier with all the payees on one page (after I set them all up) but I never really had any trouble remembering to pay three bills on three different websites. So I'm signed up for online bill pay which costs $5.75 a month but is free if you've got this super-platunim player's checking account that online bill pay makes free... seems nonsenically cyclical and backwards, are you sure I'm reading this right?

So essentially you'd charge me more money if I took advantage of fewer of your services, and less money if I make you do more work? Yeah, I know its really about locking me in to the institution to make changing banks more of a hassle. (which is why they weren't worried about me leaving when I had a loan) But honestly the only thing that made me think about leaving in 7 years was your 'incentive' to stay. Seems a little effed up if you ask me.

Foil Ball Status

2009-04-23T14:30:00.001-07:00

Okay, I'm about half a bag in and this is what I've got so far. Its a little slower going than I'd first imagined. I've included a quarter for scale, as well as a pound for our UK readers.

Just So's You Know.

2009-04-20T12:05:00.001-07:00

Am constructing foil ball from Reese's Mini Cups wrappers. Updates to follow.

I am now 10,002 days old. Feels very similar to 9,999.

Also, I may have had too many Reese's Cups today.

You're So Old.

2009-04-17T22:05:00.001-07:00

Yo dog, apparently I'm not cool enough chastising the intertubes by calling them intertubes anymore. There's a meme a week; nay a meme a day to catch up on. This must be exactly what happened to your grandparents. They got excruciatingly tired of keeping up with the meaningless minutea on the twitter and lapsed into old age. so while this Jalopnik explainer might be extremely useful, it should also be depressing. Because nomatter how with the times you though you were, you're not. You can't help but lag behind. And if you're not, you need to get a life, or at least something to do between 1 and 4. 7-11 might be hiring?

Jalopnik- yo dawg i herd you- explainer

Spot Of Tea, You Jackass?

2009-04-16T06:50:00.001-07:00

You are goddamn idiots. Pardon my french. First off, you've been talking about tea-bagging for the last two months with virtually no idea what you're saying. (aside from the testicle thing) The Boston Tea Party was a protest about taxation by a foreign government that afforded no representation to the populace. You are represented, we had elections, you just lost. So if you're unhappy with the way our government is spending tax money, you can write to your representative or wait till his term is up. But know that while there may be 10,000 of you that object, there's millions more that trust our elected public officials. So the entire symbol for your "movement" is wrong. Like Jon Stewart said "You're the minority now, its supposed to taste like a sh*t taco."

Furthermore, if you wanted to have the Boston Tea Party's effect, you would find some way to lower your taxable income. I'm guessing buying teabags to dump on the ground as part of a grass-roots protest doesn't qualify as a deduction. So you might just end up working less, giving away more or just not paying your taxes and accepting whatever consequences that entails. Oh, you're not that upset? Well eff off.

And the slate article points out that your political label is becoming quite outdated, especially as Democratic priorities are made forefront. "Protests by definition oppose the status quo, which conservatism is supposed to defend. Protesting for conservatism is, to borrow a phrase, like fucking for virginity." You're gonna have to think of something else to call yourselves soon, I'm thinking something along the lines of "goddamn idiots". I'll see you out there next month with your "I object to protesting" picket signs.

Next up, you object to "this administration's" wasteful government spending. Yeah, it sucks that all the damn banks collapsed and that they made so many bad loans for so long. But have you really forgotten about the last 8 years already? The hands off 'regulation' that allowed this to happen in the first place and the $700 billion Bush urged Congress to approve before he left office? And how much money that we didn't have was spent on a discretionary war? And the "pork filled budget" was your effing representatives trying to spend federal money in your districts. Creating jobs and paying Americans in tough times. Plus we get new roads, smart electrical grids and renewable energy out of the deal. How is rallying behind an expensive, unwinnable, unjust war 'patriotic' and re-investing in America with socially beneficial programs not? I guess I didn't get that memo.

After all of 4 months in office, you're so tired of the cleanup effort that you just can't keep silent any more? You're blaming the chemo instead of the cigarettes. In all honestly too many Americans have been playing with pretend money, up to our eyeballs in debt. It never really made sense to me, but I've always thought that you should be able to pay for what you buy. We (through the government) are finally paying for the reckless lending and spending that we've been taking part in for the past decade. That's the price of the new American Dream of "something for nothing". Maybe a new depression will jolt us back into the strangely coherent motto of "work hard and live happy" that made us a world power to begin with.

Conservative protesters hold a "tea party" without any tea bags. - By Christopher Beam - Slate Magazine

Breaking News for 2007!

2009-04-15T07:21:00.000-07:00

VeeDub, you are about 4 years late on this noise. Don't get me wrong, you make great little cars and it tickles my fancy that you've got consumer diesels popped in some of them. But I considered buying a diesel 2 years ago when I got my car and there was no where to put your hands on one. If you'd been pushing a little harder you could have as many tdi rolling around out there as there are priusesss.

I'm for diversification of our energy consumption, which means that some folk will still be using fossil fuels when it makes more sense for most drivers to rock the electric. So efficient engines are great news, but I get the feeling that you're distracted. You'd better be working on an electric powerplant to plunk into one of these buggers too.

VW forecasts 30% of 2010 Golf sales in US will be for TDI

Pirate Disambiguation.

2009-04-15T07:13:00.001-07:00

Yar. There's been a lot of pirate talk lately. Maybe its cause there are more high profile incidents or maybe there's finally been enough media coverage, but I think it may be because we're finally getting pissed off about it. In fact there's been some (online) debate about changing the term for digital "piracy" because comparing copying "American Pie 6, The Pie's Revenge" to shooting rpgs at food aid freighters and ransoming hostages isn't exactly fair. Of course there's a split in commercial digital pirates who're making money from their excercises and the regular digital pirates who object to some machination of the industry they're standing against.

The Internet has had a virtual love-affair with two kinds of piracy, starting out with copying software that was prohibitively expensive. It was the lone web navigator sticking it to the crown and playing by his own rules. Then came the old school pirate meme whereby we romanticized historical piracy. These swarthily dressed rapscallions of our imagination were free spirits who refused to conform. They were symbols of independence and defiance that made for kick-ass theme parties. They magically diverged from the most fundamental doctrines like rape, pillage, murder, plunder and rape. So when we think of an old school pirate our minds conjure this Renaissance fair character, Jack Sparrow or Westley. I guess that's the difference between an old school pirate and a historical pirate; throat slashing.

And then of course there are these modern pirates who are more like amphibian South American guerrillas. They swoop in, take some hostages, get the pay off and swoop away for the next score. Private energy companies have been dealing with this for years, just not on the ocean. They're no pirates in that they don't want the things they capture. Bank robbers want the money in the vault. Pirates want the cargo on the ship. Modern pirates are kidnappers who hold a ship hostage and flee in dinghies. There are all kinds of justifications for what they do, but its getting harder and harder to believe there is some kind of honor in their trade. And I gotta say, I'm surprisingly okay with shooting them in the head. I mean, this is exactly the opposite of my view on 'insurgents'. We create more hostility and more combatants for every military action. Maybe the insurgents and the kidnappers are more similar than I think but it doesn't seem like there's much ideology behind "first you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women".

So there you go, my take on piracy.

Digital (chinese and regular)
Old School (fantasy and historical)
Modern (kidnappers)

Variable Whatnow?

2009-04-15T06:25:00.001-07:00

Oh Amazon, say it ain't so. You've bucked the system for so long now, offering mp3 format and 89 cent tracks. Its honestly easier for me to buy music from you than from iTunes. (that program is so slow...) But now it seems you've caught the "scarce goods" bug that's been going around the music industry. Its no surprise that apple got it, I mean, if you go as hot and heavy as those dudes have been going...

Anyway, let me try to explain this. Songs are not scarce. CD might become scarce, but when you're just sending bits, copies of a file, there's no way you're gonna run out. Unless you use all the electricity in the world, but at that point I think you've done pretty well for yourself and we've got other problems on the table. Okay, so jacking up the prices on sought after tracks will only serve to make them less desirable.

Music Industry Folks Worried About iTunes Variable Pricing | Techdirt

You've managed to get yourselves into a position where people are willing to pay for something that used to be free. Maybe you scared them into playing by the rules with gratuitous lawsuits, maybe *shock* you made it easier to find what people are looking for, maybe you stoped treating your customers like criminals, or maybe the stars have aligned and you are infallible. Whatever the reason, you've got a client base, and a magical store that demands virtually no overhead on a per-unit basis. Don't hike the price (based on artificial demand) and drive down sales. If anything you should be lowering prices to drive up gross sales.

Just so you know, I will not be buying any $1.29 tracks. Ever. Haven't you heard? Its a depression and people are cutting back on non-essential items. First on the list, baseless 30 cent surcharges on non-tangible goods.

Variable pricing spreads to Amazon, Lala, Rhapsody, Wal-Mart - Ars Technica

I Got It!

2009-03-23T07:42:00.001-07:00

After getting so pumped up about google voice I had to sit and simmer till it was my turn to get upgraded. But the time finally came and it looks pretty snazzy. My google contacts are all there instead of my grandcentral ones, which is great because i never put much effort into my GC list. Also on the great list is the "call presentation" option. This is the message that's played when you answer a call from grandcentral. Your caller Id will give the caller's number, but when you answer a voice tells you who's calling and lists options to answer, send to voicemail, or listen in. This is a nice feature when you're not sure who's calling, but kind of a pain when I thought I was answering a call from a friend and have to hit 1 to actually talk to them. So now I can set either by group or individual whether I want to hear that prompt of just immediately answer when I pick up. Pretty sweet. The only downside is that if they do go to voicemail, it'll be my phone's vm, which won't transcribe and email me. Anyway, I'm still testing it out, but so far it looks pretty well thought out and the new SMS feature totally works. So your GV number now works like you'd expect a phone number would.

Here's a widget that'll let you leave me a voicemail:

(keep it clean)

Talk Googly To Me.

2009-03-12T05:26:00.000-07:00

Sweet! Looks like Google is finally ready to transition Grand Central into a grown-up Google app. Its gonna be called Google Voice and is open to everyone who already has a grand central account. What? You didn't sign up when I told you to? Oh, well then you'll just have to wait like a sucker till it gets rolled out to the plebes. I guess you can take a look to see what you're missing.

Google Voice-Features

So, most excitingly, there's a voice mail transcripts feature. Which I assume will just plunk peoples' VM into your gmail inbox with all the other messages you care about. Which seems pretty cool and even more exciting when you imagine the kind of Android implementation this service will get. So it looks like someone's realized that messaging is messaging, and I don't care what medium is used. The less places I have to check for new communications the better. Throw them all in the same inbox and use filters to sort if necessary.

It'll also be nice when they integrate my gmail contacts list with the Grand Central list that I never maintained all that well. Google, keeping your informations sorted and updated and happy.

Official Google Blog: Here comes Google Voice

P.S. What's up with the sample video? "I left the secret plans on your desk?" Sounds a little shady... Are they finally ready to launch that space laser?

P.P.S. Still waiting on my upgrade link in Grand Central, apparently it could take days for the roll-out to finish. Why did I get so excited this morning?

google voice blog

Hey, You Suck.

2009-03-10T07:48:00.000-07:00

So I got an email today from the Democratic Party about their plans to respond to Rush Limbaugh. Basically they're taking out an ad that says "you suck".

Last week, I asked if you had a message you'd like to send Rush Limbaugh. The response was overwhelming. We received tens of thousands of submissions, and we picked the top five:
"Americans didn't vote for a Rush to failure"
"Hope and change cannot be Rush'd"
"Failure is not an option for America's future"
"We can fix America, just don't Rush it"
"Rush: Say yes to America"
Now, we're putting it up for a vote. Decide which slogan Rush will see in his home town.

The slogan with the most votes will be put on a billboard where Rush can't miss it.

Now, I did not submit an entry, but I'd like to throw out a couple more options that I feel would better express the sentiment we're after.
"Rush should be neither seen nor heard."
"Hey Rush, shut the fuck up."
"Sorry Rush, we'd invite you in but the rotunda isn't big enough to fit your fat head. And we hate you."
"Radio is for losers."
"We took a vote. Rush, you're off the island."
"We're considering legislation to rename this dude 'Douche-bag' Limbaugh."
How much does a billboard cost anyway?

Tax Math.

2009-03-05T11:54:00.001-08:00

There's been quite a lot of arguing about budgets and tax plans lately, and its been going on since before the primary elections. It may seem confusing to watch all the contradictory claims hurled about and in the end you feel like somebody needs to get called a liar. But such is semantics, you can have two seemingly opposite statements (Ben loves bananas. Ben hates bananas.) that with an untold context (I'm talking about two different Bens) are both true.

So when listening to the President's plan to lower taxes (for most people) and the Republicans' claims that Obama will raise taxes for all Americans, its maybe helpful to examine the subtext of what each side really means. Here's the AP breaking it down:

THE CLAIM: "The president's budget increases taxes on every American, and does so during a recession," said Rep. Dave Camp of Michigan, the top Republican on the tax-writing House Ways and Means Committee. "Let's just be honest and call it a carbon tax that will increase taxes on all Americans who drive a car, who have a job, who turn on a light switch, pure and simple," House Minority leader John Boehner, R-Ohio, said of Obama's plan to impose a tariff on polluters.
THE FACTS: Under Obama's plan, tax cuts enacted under President George W. Bush for families making more than $250,000 would be allowed to expire in 2011, increasing the top income tax rate from 35 percent to 39.6 percent. The top capital gains tax rate would jump from 15 percent to 20 percent. Middle- and low-income taxpayers - 95 percent of Americans, by the president's calculations - would receive a new tax credit
Obama also would impose fees on greenhouse gas producers, including power plants that burn fossil fuels, by auctioning off carbon pollution permits. The goal is to reduce the emissions blamed for global warming. The fees would raise a projected $646 billion over 10 years. Obama aides don't dispute that consumers will get the passed-along costs. In testimony to the House Ways and Means Committee in September, White House budget chief Peter Orszag, then the director of the Congressional Budget Office, said companies that have to pay the emissions fees "would not ultimately bear most of the costs of the allowances. Instead, they would pass them along to their customers (and their customers' customers) in the form of higher prices." The added cost to consumers is meant as an incentive to reduce energy consumption. "If people don't change how they use energy, then they will face higher costs for energy," Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner said Tuesday.

That emphasis is mine, but that's the real crux of the matter. The Republicans may be right that it'll cost more to keep living the way we do under Obama's new tax plan. And that's the goddamn point, to raise the cost of living for lifestyles that are unsustainable. Sometimes it seems like conservatives would rather keep burning oil and coal until they're so scarce that the markets force consumers into an alternative, why walk off a cliff if you can see it coming?

Imagine your buddy suggesting you stop drinking tequila before you pee your pants, vomit on the floor and drive his car through a Starbucks window. You don't really want to, and you're not making sense, so maybe he provides a little incentive upside your head.

Money-grubbers: Obama's just trying to motivate in a language you speak, hitting you in the wallet so that you'll understand its cheaper to use renewable resources and consume less energy. Or maybe you'd prefer if Obama came to your house and punched you in the face every week until you stopped polluting so much.

The Associated Press:FACT CHECK-Obama 'tax hikes' a matter of words

Bottled Puke.

2009-03-04T12:58:00.001-08:00

Read through a few "articles" of this blatant astro-turf for the bottled water industry. They've got peppy responses to a variety of reasons people shouldn't be using disposable plastic bottles. Here's a little summary of one:

Solid Waste:
plastic bottles are only .3 percent of our solid waste
nothing in a landfill will biodegrade anyway
we have plenty of space for more landfills

See? There's no reason not to use plastic bottles! This kinda logic keeps rolling in:

Footprints?:
plastic bottles don't effect global warming
we couldn't change global warming if we wanted to
plastic is cheaper to produce and transport than glass or metal
we should make money while we can and adapt to climate change when we need to

Sweet Samson, I wanna smack somebody. I've got no problem with plastic or bottles. Its excess that's the problem; packaging and transporting a product that is already piped to virtually every building in our country is excess. Sure, brining potable water to regions that lack it is worthwhile, but enabling this disposable culture is wasteful and disgraceful.

There's even a petition (that 351 people have signed) espousing the virtues of bottle water including its vacuous nutrition information and the fact that donations of bottled water help victims of disasters.

It makes me feel dirty all over. I wish they had a comment section where I could vomit everywhere. But they don't seem to have any real user feedback method in place. At least I can't figure it out. Odd. They do have contact information for the Competitive Enterprise Institute, a DC "think" tank obviously responsible for the repulsive content.

Basically they think that government regulation is unnecessary in the commercial market and consumers should buy whatever they want. Sounds good until you remember that government regulation is generally meant to protect consumers from the kinds of corporations that fund CEI.

They seem to take issue with publicly funded campaigns urging people to drink municipal tap water, but see no problem with corporations funding third parties to discourage the regulation of their industries. Assholes.

Check Under Your Bed Tonight.

2009-03-04T06:55:00.000-08:00

I'm not really sure why this picture just screams "Khaaan!" to me. I mean apparently Kirk wasn't even raising his arms when he screamed it in Wrath Of Kahn.

In fact the more I look at it I'm sure its a "Fuck you I'm an anteater" photo. Although maybe he's saying "Fuck you this is my good side".

Anyway, this dude is a Giant rat caught in China. We're talking 6 pounds with 12 inch tail and 1 inch teeth. A big creepy crawly. I bet he'd give a normal cat a run for his money.

I would not want to run into this dude in a dark alley, much less jump on top of it while others encircled it as this slightly insane Chinese man did. He then stuffed it in a sack and took it home. Yeah.

Environmental Graffiti: Giant Rat Caught in China!

Now That's Entertainment.

2009-03-03T12:07:00.000-08:00

A metrobus driver decided to take care of a little business during his run today. He apparently stopped the bus, walked off, and punched a McGruff character in the face. I'm not really sure what would provoke such an action. I mean, yeah I've seen people being mean to mascots, but they don't usually stop vehicles or take time off work to do so. Anyway the officer wearing the McGruff costume called in the assault and the perp got nabbed. He said it was to be funny, but I've got a feeling its cause he's off his nutt.

Note to self: people wearing McGruff suits are usually cops.

Why Did a Metrobus Driver Punch McGruff the Crime Dog? - DCist: Washington DC News, Food, Arts & Events

Irk At Work.

2009-02-26T10:43:00.000-08:00

Irk is an odd word. Roll it around in your mouth a little. Nice and succinct, but being so compact and quickly drawn, it seems to somewhat lack the punch I feel it deserves. Merriam-Webster says:

irk (ˈərk):to make weary, irritated, or bored.

I do not generally think 'wearied' or 'bored' when I think of 'irked'. Irritated, yes, but in a way that makes the bottom of your heart quiver a smidgen in your chest. Your lips may purse, but you are not moved to action. And its this lack of response that makes irking such a potent phenomenon. The thought rattles around in your head, landing in a pile and attaching to exact copies of itself from each past occurrence of the irk. There they jumble, with no outlet or exhaust. Perhaps one day they will grow into an annoyance to be acted upon, dealt with and resolved, but for now they are too trivial. They reside, waiting only for the next worthless addition. Dictionary.com says:

irk: to irritate, annoy, or exasperate.

Now we're on the right track. I like exasperate's tone. But just a small exasperation, one that does not quite qualify. I also envision an exasperation as somewhat of a surprise or shock. This was an unexpected occurrence, almost an unbelievable annoyance; whereas an irk is an almost frequent event, verging on routine. It has happened before, and in all likelihood, it will happen again. Soon. "Aggravate" is listed under the thesaurus.com definition which may be a better fit as far as future perfect concepts are concerned.

But there is a violence to that word that has no business in irk. Whether in transgression or response, 'aggravate' bears not just the threat of action, but the promise of aggression. Likewise with 'irritate', though less threatening, it seems to convey a distinctly physical meaning. Toes may be irritated by shoes, but never irked. Perhaps because irritations heal, whereas irks are never tended to. Irks remain abstract, locked in the psyche. Poked, prodded and irritated by a non-existent finger.

Maybe that's the problem, my adjectives are centered around touch or sound. Maybe irks are smells and tastes. 'Distaste' is good but too obvious, and too easily equated to 'dislike' which does not properly express depth. The overall sensation of an unpleasant lingering flavor may be close, but tastes are too easily avoided. An irk is perceived and produced in the same instant, there are no secondary symptoms to predict its arrival. 'Repugnance' seems like an olfactory irk, but again, it is too strong. Something repugnant would be avoided, even of one could not see it. I'm not very good at thinking with my nose or tongue, so this route may be personally limited.

I try to think ethereally and arrive with 'haunt'. That's nice. There is a good amount of futility in resistance, it is repetitive and incorporeal. But like the others I find problems with this synonym. A haunting thought may be the same one drifting around again and again, as opposed to instances of the same irksome object. A pile of deciduous leaves, mental disregard allows them to and clutter and rustle.

I know this may be a futile exercise, since the word for what I'm describing already exists and is, in fact, 'irk'. At least that's what it means to me, so hopefully now, if not before, you realize how much thought and contemplation have gone into the term. So when I tell you that something irks me, I want you to understand my full meaning.

It irks me when people are told to disregard an alarm for a blanket period of time. Case in point, my building routinely places signs on all entrances instructing occupants to disregard the fire alarm today as they are being tested, worked on, etc. In fact they have laminated the signage since this happens so frequently. Excuse me? Aren't the alarms there for a reason? What if there's a fire in the building? Oh, you'll just run around telling everyone there's a fire, good, great. Why isn't that the default system every day? It should be illegal to instruct people en mass to ignore public safety alarms for anything but a concise period. This happened at my conference last week as well. We initially evacuated the building after the lights flashed and a very loud and scary alarm sounded. Later after everyone was readmitted, we were instructed via Public Address to ignore any further alarms that day. I understand the likelyhood of an incident after a false alarm may be fairly low, but these devices are meant to stimulate a response. Much like car alarms, these false fire alarms (and non-evacuations) dilute emergency procedures and make people's first response to question the alarm's validity.

The System Is Down.

2009-02-26T07:28:00.001-08:00

Now this is nice. I like more of an explanation than "the service was out; now its not" and the incident report gives a bit more detail. Although its a little vague about exactly what happened, you get the jist that they had a bug in their server load sharing algorithm, so when one was taken off-line for maintenance, too many people were redirected to another. The "multiple downstream overload conditions" sounds like a neat cascading system of propagating errors. But maybe I'm a big dork.

Apps Status Dashboard

P.S. The System Is Down is a nice beat for all your lightswitch rave needs.

P.S.S. I totally didn't notice this outtage and I'm on the gmails like all effing day.

Spirited Away.

2009-02-23T10:53:00.001-08:00

Wow, this reminds me of old-timey villians who kidnap orphans and make them work changing bobbins in textile factories. Or maybe the camp counselors who have campers produce sweatshop knock-off handbags and sell them near urine strewn underpasses.

Two PA judges are being charged with taking kick-backs for sending children to juvenile detention centers since 2003. It seems these judges had a tendency to skip right over probation or leniency for first time offenders, and now their victims know why. This kind of corruption makes me want to whack a big old fat-white-dude-in-a-suit piñata. Wait; would that be an effigy, or does it have to be burned to constitute and effigy?

Judges Plead Guilty in Scheme to Jail Youths for Profit - NYTimes.com

Ummm...

2009-02-19T19:01:00.001-08:00

That doesn't look good at all...

Immoral?

2009-02-19T18:17:00.001-08:00

There's nothing quite like surveling people when you're drunk. I mean not caring if they see you watching them. This dude is trying to "hit" something tonight, and it looks like he's got a pretty good prosptect. Although there's a close second off to the left, and honsetly, she wants it more. btw... We just finished a conversation about how he can't sleep through sirens, and will be awake anyway...

Here's johnny...

2009-02-19T17:36:00.001-08:00

I know this is all out of order unless you subscribe to the dp rss feed, so scroll down a bit to figure out what the hell i'm talking about.

Also, does anyone subscribe to the dp rss feed? I know i discourage it with my harsh demeanor, but i won't really come to your house and teabag you if you do. Its good for the environment?

Anyway this is the faucet that is in-freaking-sane. I mean he watches you no matter where you are! Maybe it makes people feel more self conscious, but seriously when you design a fixture like this you know its happening, right? Its not an accident.

Someone wants me to think a little smiley face is watching me wash my hands, which I'm fine with. But I can't help but wonder about the kinds of faces he makes at people who flush the urinal and return straight to the party. Do not anger the sink fixtures, they can cause unimaginable misery. Seriously, just wash your damn hands. Apparently conferences make me think of restroom etiquette.

http://www.dailyplacebo.com/2006/08/sojourn.html
http://www.dailyplacebo.com/2007/01/reverse-anthropomorphism.html

I'm not obsessed with john.

2009-02-19T17:31:00.001-08:00

Seroiusly, I haven't spent the entire time in the pisser, but this is a little bit freaky. You know that old tale about the portrait that tracks your gaze across a room? Well feast your eyes on this bad boy; whoever designed this faucet must have known what he was doing. Close up to follow...

The watering hole.

2009-02-19T17:18:00.001-08:00

Okay, so this is really amusing. I'm away from the socializing to make a phone call (and cause I hate socializing) and I'm observing an interesting trend. Guys are walking around this corner for the restroom and they invariably see the big-ass men's room sign. However the newbies all turn left once in the alcove, although the true entrance lies to the right. So its a pretty easy categorization. Newly drunk men walk past, turn left and then walk past again to get to the John. Guys who've had more to drink round the corner and head straight to their destination; they've been there before. And guys who are eight drinks in are standing across the hall taking pictures and blogging the whole event...

Too much info

2009-02-19T16:17:00.001-08:00

You don't want to know this... But the dude in the stall next to me just tore the place apart. I'm a little jealous of how quickly he completed the transaction, but at the same time I feel a little bad for snickering when it went down. Oh well. And now you know.

Sweet Raptor-Riding-Jesus.

2009-02-18T19:05:00.000-08:00

Just take a hott second to soak this in. [[hott second]] Now consider how many of your neighbors don't believe in evolution. And look back up at that diagram and tell me it doesn't scare you a little.

Evolution Less Accepted in U.S. Than Other Western Countries, Study Finds

Of course that's crazy, the real whack-jobs we have to worry about will deny the existence of dinosaurs altogether. If they're willing to concede thunder lizards, they're open to conversations about facts and are reasonable people.

Just to be clear, I've got no issues with thoughts of a groovy old dude with a beard throwing down gracious love from a cloud. But if you're of the disposition to find creationism mutually exclusive with the refinement of genetics by natural selection as evidenced by fossil record and a variety of thriving organisms on our planet, then you might should head right on back to grade school for a do-over.

Residential Freeway.

2009-02-17T18:31:00.000-08:00

This is a lot like the articles I was all up ons a while ago from Europe. There were various studies and traffic control designers that found car drivers would slow down if the environment felt like slower speeds were required. And the best way to convey that is not with a speed limit sign, but with other visual cues. In one study, they found removing all lane lines and signals worked best. Hang on, let me see if I can find that mess...

Daily Placebo: I'm Ignoring Traffic Lights From Now On.

Yeah, that's exactly what I'm talking about. September 2006. If you didn't read it, go ahead and take a minute; I'll wait. Yeah? Good stuff right? Well it really hit home when I read this article in GGW about Conn ave. I commuted up and down that road for a year, so I can personally attest that its a six lane highway out of the city that happens to run through a certain moneyed neighborhood. Now, I understand that Chevy Chase doesn't want high velocity traffic running right through the middle of it, but maybe they should design a road that feels like the speed limit is 30, instead of slapping a lower limit on a faster road and sending tickets to every car that drives down it.

Traffic slows just south of Chevy Chase Circle (in DC) because there are cross streets, shopping centers and pedestrians. That seems like a much more effective control measure than white signs and speed cameras disguised as trashcans. Unless your real goal is benjamins, not safely.

Design for speed, collect the dough - Greater Greater Washington

Machines Making Art.

2009-02-16T18:20:00.000-08:00

If you hadn't heard, the writers guild is stepping up to become the next artistic representative to be despised by the populous is exists because of. Of course its got a long way to go to be an RIAA or an MPAA, but you gotta start somewhere. And objecting to the kindle II's ability to interpret written text into an audible format is a good start. Apparently they thing the rights to read a book and the rights to read a book out loud should be sold separately.

Actually no, that's not fair, they're willing to admit you're allowed to read a book to whoever you want in a private and non-commercial setting. But they are taking issue with an automated reader that they percieve as an infringement into their audio book market. Which is of course ridiculous.

I had two thoughts about this today.

First, what are the standards in music? Buying sheet music of a song is not the same as buying a CD of a musician playing the song. But you certainly have the right to play the sheet music at home on a piano. Do you also have the right to have a synthesizer play back the song? I think so. Is that really viable competition to (and infringement of) the professionally produced and artist performed version? I wouldn't think so.

Second, what if there was an automatic writing machine that could create works of text with virtually no human input? Would it put human authors out of business or would the Writer's Guild assert that human authors brought something more to the table than machines could?

I guess what I'm trying to get at is that the audio books are performances of written material. They're also selling the source material which is essentially instructions for creating private performances, whether human or not. If they're upset about losing some income, the Writers Guild should be focusing on value they could add rather than trying to limit the options of its customers.

Authors Guild Digs Itself In Deeper Concerning Kindle Text-To-Speech

When GM Veggies Dream.

2009-02-14T18:16:00.000-08:00

If anything says happy valentine's day better than asparagus wrapped in bacon, I don't want to hear about it.

Throw It On The Pile.

2009-02-12T05:51:00.001-08:00

So I haven't really been able to tell that Helio was bought up by Virgin Mobile, aside from the various tech articles telling me it had happened. My phone still uses Sprint and Verizon towers, I still go to helio.com to check my account and my auto-pay schema is intact. So here's the first change that Helio customers have seen since the takeover.

We want to continue to keep you up-to-date on important changes like these now that Helio is Virgin Mobile. Your nights will automatically start two hours earlier, at 7PM. That's right, you'll get to enjoy unlimited talk time from 7PM - 7AM, Monday through Friday, and all weekend long. To get this extra talk time, all you need to do is keep using your Virgin Mobile service.

Huh... okay. I mean, I don't really come close to using the 400 minutes I get every month anyway (54 so far this month, which is pretty high), but if you want to throw in a bunch more free hours I guess that's cool. What would really get me hot and buttered would be a 100 minute plan for 30 bucks or something. Then I might care about the free night and weekends you're spreading around like tax breaks at a GOP rally.

Touch Me Twice.

2009-02-11T06:14:00.001-08:00

I could see Apple being the type of company that restricts users and intellectual "property" to keep them tethered to its own devices. Which is what most lends credence to this rumor of Apple asking Google to remove multi-touch from its Android OS. And that's what it looks like happened, the feature was implemented and then commented out of the release. Although its not that big a deal if you really care about it. Android is open source, just uncomment the feature and run your own build. The real question is whether Android developers will anticipate an audience of "hacked" multi-touch users and include functions to take advantage.

Some people raise flags that Apple could seemingly command partner Google, and rather than risk the fickle reprisals in which Apple is known to engage. Yeah, that's kinda silly, but I'd rather keep my Google brand iPod apps and the G1 not be tied up in litigation, so I'm fine with Google's decision. I think the real problem is that Apple thinks it owns multi-touch to begin with. Folks have been working on multi-touch since 1982, and sure, Apple brought a device to maket with the technology after buying up a company that made then since 1999. But come on, using more than one finger to interact with a device? How in the hell is that not obvious? Hmmm... I've made a touch screen that responds when I touch it with my finger... I have ten fingers... I guess I'm all done here.

And even if you are an Apple fanboy, this shouldn't seem cool because now instead of dreaming up that next great feature, Apple can sit around on the multi-touch hill, making sure no one else tries to climb it.

Did Google Leave Multi-Touch Out Of Android At Apple's Behest? | Techdirt

Pocket Clouds.

2009-02-10T13:35:00.001-08:00

So google powered up a microsoft exchange server so big it would eat your car and now people with exchange enabled devices can sync their contacts and calendars as if they were big-wig fancy-pants business-types. That means iPhones, blackberry, etcetera folks. Now, this was one of the good reasons that I was so partial to an Android powered phone, so you might say that this is google shooting a hole in its own foot. But on the other hand google isn't the kind of company that restricts users to drive them towards a more lucrative business model that they don't really need. (*Ahem* Verizon...)

Anyway, if you've bought into gmail real hard, like most semi-savy folks have, there's a good chance you could be convinced to manage your contacts there if the changes would propagate to all your other devices. So its in google's interest to have you using their web apps no matter your handset of choice.

Extra bonus nugget: I've been managing my contacts in gmail for quite a while and the thing that irked me most was when people would get added under multiple email addresses. There was no way to merge them and it was a pain to fix. Well that's not a problem any more. So go spruce up your list and get on the train. I've got my contacts and calendar rocking on my ipod and its awesome.

Also, turn on your google latitude account. No one cares that much about where you are, so stop freaking out. Although I think there's a mode lacking in the privacy settings, the old I'll show you mine if you show me yours.

That's it. Tech guru out.

Google Mobile - Sync

They're not THAT good.

2009-02-09T07:07:00.001-08:00

Ummm... Really? Did the onion write this article in January of 2001? I feel like they're just messing with me.

Bush: 'Our Long National Nightmare Of Peace And Prosperity Is Finally Over' | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

Second Impressions.

2009-01-29T10:07:00.001-08:00

Last year I got a loaner TL from Acura when I took my car to the dealer for some work. It was nice, but not, like, amazing. Today I got an 09 TL, and let me say, that car is a little sick. I wasn't too sure about the wireless key whatchamadeally at first, but now I'm pretty sure I like just walking over to the car, opening the door and pressing the go button. (it adjusts the seat to the key id's preferences too) The back-up camera is a little bit of over-kill, but I could see it being useful in certain situations. But it does tilt the side mirrors for reversing, which I love. The nav system is pretty sweet too, once you figure out the basics, and live traffic updates is awesome. I usually have to get out my phone for that noise. But best of all for this weather is the traction control that keeps the wheels from spinning when I lay down the I-don't-know-how-many horsepower all over the slushy blacktop. There's also a little light that blinks when I go around corners really quickly too, but I can't see what it says, I'm busy looking elsewhere. I still love my car, but quite honestly this car is way nicer and I'll miss a couple things when its gone. Too bad they don't make it in a two door on a civic-like platform. I just don't need this much car.

Bangwagon Badgering.

2009-01-29T09:50:00.001-08:00

So my new favorite pointless blog about nothing, fuckyoupenguin, has a post today about snow leopards. Since I recently acquainted myself with the intimate workings of the Panthera genus, I felt compelled to add to the accusations. I'm just so clever that I wanted to share with you.

My comment is reposted below:

And what fuck is up with your scientific classification? Its in your damn name... leopard. You are clearly a sub-species of the... wait for it... LEOPARD! You and your freakshow cousins in the Neofelis Genus. What, you think you're so special cause you can't roar? That's ridiculous. I can't roar either, snow leopard, do I get my own genus and species? No. So get your ass over to Panthera Pardus before I really get angry. We're done here.

TL AI.

2009-01-29T04:40:00.001-08:00

What? You're not gonna park yourself? I see you looking out the back, sizing up the situation. You're in reverse, idling in the right direction. What? You can't turn the wheel a few degrees. Come on TL, I thought you were a fancy driving machine and you can't even get it together enough to back into a spot. You've got little flashing light and power control protocols that spring into action when you're sliding sideways, or when your go pedal is pressed too hard on slick surfaces. You're trying to tell me you can't handle this one, tiny, last task? Pff. I don't even know why you have a fancy key that's not a key and uber complicated voice activated menus that you repeat to me in a nauseatingly accentless drone. Oh, fine. I'll goose the gas and match up the lines. Actually I think I've played this video game before. Atari? Virtual boy? Something...

Picture of the Day.

2009-01-27T11:17:00.001-08:00

I hope this dude burns. Hard.

In Barack Obama's America...

2009-01-21T10:40:00.000-08:00

In Barack Obama's America there's no booing.
In Barack Obama's America sno-cones are free on weekends.
In Barack Obama's America pigeons poop rainbows and gold.Well that was crazy. I mean, it was really a spectacle like I'd imagined. Although, in retrospect, I hadn't really imagined it all that thoroughly. Two million people walking through the streets is something that I just had to experience before I could conceive. Its not just that there are streets filled with people. All the streets are filled. I've never thought of people as a liquid before. It is not some grand parade, everyone is going somewhere different. No one is really sure where though. Everyone is trying to beat the crowd and the crowd control. And every time you get to where you think the crowd won't be, its beaten you there.But don't let me make it sound competitive or angry. Everyone is smiling and happy. Everyone is helpful. Sort of. "Do you know where you're going?" "No idea!" was a common exchange. At one point a stalled crowd was swelling against a chain link and it gradually transitioned into shaking the fence. I could imagine the fence falling with a sigh and the surge of people into the empty construction area (not a security area, just a street rehab effort) But just then a woman yelled "Barack Obama wouldn't want you doing that" and they stopped. They behaved. They were not a mob, but a group of proud and jubilant people. He will be a better president for us, and we have to be better for him.
I don't think I've seen more law enforcement personnel in the entirety of my life. I also have an accurate image of what the world would be like if black towncars, suburbans and police cruisers and were the only automobiles. And they all had lights and sirens. We made it through the maze of bus barricades, closed entrances and the no-walk zone that city thoroughfare Pennsylvania Ave had become. We were on the mall, a feat whose feasibility I'd begun to doubt. As we climbed the hill of the Washington monument the east half of the mall stretched before us a sea of people. All waiting watching and drinking in the spectacle that we all were. We huddled like penguins against the wind, clapped like seals with our gloved hands and cheered like people who finally wintessed the fruits of their peaceful democracy.So here we go. A new era of hope and prosperity. Of compassionate and constitutional government. Of science and stewardship. I spose its also the end of me being able to complain willy-nilly about the ridiculous state of politics. This is the best thing I can imagine happening for our country and the world. But this is only the start. The next step is ourselves. The policies and practices will change and we will need to change too. Make this a better time to be an American. Lend a hand to your fellow people, and together we will make this a great nation to be proud of again.In Barack Obama's America people help each other instead of being left to help themselves.

How Retro!

2009-01-16T11:10:00.000-08:00

Here's a blast from the past. Anyone remember Hott Spotting? Its been quite a while and I'd actually shut down the submission email address (hottspot at dp dot com) so Dee S Nutts #2 had to send this one to me by carrier pigeon. Its some kinda fancy-pants Lamborghini with "I can park in super thin spaces and still get out" doors. Actually looks a lot like the one I saw in London a while ago.

Here It Comes.

2009-01-12T12:39:00.000-08:00

CRAP! I can't believe I snoozed on the chance to jump and cheer for faux-bama.

Inauguration Dress Rehearsal Looks Almost Like the Real Thing - NYTimes.com

Tiny Vacation.

2009-01-12T10:11:00.000-08:00

I've been meaning to get into some tilt-shift effects for a while now. Basically that means creating an artificial depth of field using post processing techniques. But up until recently it just seemed like a lot of work. Not so with tiltshiftmaker.com just upload your image and select the focal band. Of course, its pretty simple so you'll need to be laid out correctly. Quite a lot of my photos are already macro with healthy doses of DOF, so there's a limited selection of shots it'll work with. Here's a few of the best ones I've come across so far.

Future Yet?

2009-01-09T11:30:00.001-08:00

Speaking of archives, what the hell happened to this? Its 2009 for crying out loud! I want my damn magic brakes.

DailyPlacebo- Electronic Wedge Brake

I was reading various things about CES this year, and it seems like companies have been working on thinner screens and denser flash memory. We're all gonna have 500GB in our pockets and not think its a big deal in a few years. The new SD standard will max out at 2 TB. Wireless charging, folding, rolling displays, ubiquitous 3G+, touch screen, EV, UAV. All this stuff just seems like the logical next step that I've been wondering about for the last few years. And now, I'm not all that excited about it. At what point are we going to have the stuff to be in the future? Maybe I should just stop paying attention to technology news and be completely amazed when advances trickle out to the consumer market. But I don't wanna.

Science !?!

2009-01-09T09:20:00.000-08:00

This last post has got me thinking what exactly a "Bengali Panther" might actually be. Maybe a crossbred Bengal tiger and a panther? Maybe a panther who's secured a passport from Bangladesh? In my dream is was pretty much a jet black tiger, with a wider face than I'd normally think a panther would have. Well, I did some looking around and there's apparently no such thing as a panther to begin with.

Some people may want to call cougars panthers. But they're wrong, cougars are cougars, mountain lions or, perhaps most correctly, pumas. Panthers are large black cats that want to eat your soul. (See visual aid.)

Below we have the various genera of the Felidae (kitty-cat) family including both sub-families, Pantherinae (roaring; mostly) and Felinae (adorable; mostly), listed as best I can in order of size. There's nothing on the list straight-up called a "panther". (besides one of the other names for a puma, which isn't even in the Pantherinae sub-family, so that can't be right. Of course I've also got a problem with the various types of leopards, lynx, and bunches of tiny cats that somehow weaseled their own genera onto the chart. Somebody needs to do some damn housekeeping.)

Animalia, Chordata, Mammlaia, Carnivora:

Felidae

Pantherinae

Panthera- Tiger, Lion, Jaguar, Leopard
Unica- Snow Leopard
Neofelis- Clouded Leopard, Bornean Clouded Leopard

Felinae

Puma- Cougar(mountain lion, puma, panther), Jaguarundi
Acinonyx- Cheetah
Lynx- Eurasian Lynx, Bobcat, Canadian Lynx, Iberian Lynx
Caracal- Caracal (persian lynx, african lynx)
Leptailurus- Serval
Profelis- African Golden Cat
Pardofelis- Bay Cat (bornean cat, bornean red cat), Asian Golden Cat
Catopuma- Marbled Cat
Leopardus- Colocolo, Pantanal Cat, Pampas Cat, Geoffroy's Cat, Kodkod, Andean Mountain Cat, Ocelot, Oncilla, Margay
Felis- Chinese Mountain cat, Jungle Cat, Pallas' Cat, Sand Cat, Black-footed Cat, wildcat, Domestic Cat,
Prionailurus- Leopard Cat, Iriomote Cat, Flat-headed Cat, Rusty-spotted Cat, Fishing Cat

So what the hell is a panther, since a cougar is an unacceptable answer? Well, its complicated. Apparently a panther is a color variant of a jaguar, leopard, or cougar; but not a distinct species. Melanism is responsible in these black panthers for genetically darkening the typical patterns, which at closer inspection are still visible. Melanism is actually much more common in jaguars and leopards, and actually there has never been a documented case of a black cougar. (maybe that's why I think cougars can't be panthers.) The tendency appears to be environmentally selected, becoming more common in denser, darker parts of jungle.

Wikipedia- Black Panther

But then there are also white panthers which can again be jaguars, leopards, or cougars. Again, white leopards are the more common type, although albino variations are more rare than melanistc ones. So a panther can be black or white, jaguar, leopard or cougar. Basically it narrows nothing down at all except that its a non-standard coloring. Crap.

Wikipedia- White Panther

But, I digress. We've all, unfortunately, heard of white tigers. But somewhat less known, and controversially identified, are black tigers. These are usually thought not to be melanistic individuals, but either very large panthers or a cross breed tiger/panther. The sightings are diverse and unsubstantiated. (although more so than those of black pumas) So I'm gonna go with the hybrid tiger black leopard variety. Of course the instructions do not vary irregardless; try to wake up immediately.

Wikipedia- Black Tiger

Anyway, maybe that was all common knowledge, but I'm pretty sure I thought that panthers were an actual classification, and I definitely didn't know about white panthers. Maybe I was snoozing during the big cat lesson in 2nd grade, but somehow I doubt it. Read about the other ways grade school failed me in the archives.

REM School.

2009-01-09T08:07:00.001-08:00

Okay, so if your friends, while docking a 70ft motor yacht, accidentally smash through the main pier at full throttle, at which point Chief O'brien decides its a good time to light your fishing trawler on fire, forcing you to make an escape in a sailing dinghy from which you are knocked by a freak water spout into the hippo tank at the zoo, Don't worry. The killer whale and elephant will keep you safe from the hippo.

Also, if a Bengali panther asks to play, the polite response is not yes, or no, but to close your eyes tightly and try to wake up.

I'ma Be A Shrimp Boat Captain.

2009-01-08T11:29:00.001-08:00

Here's a heartwarming tale of a young boy who risked his own well being to save a little girl from vicious danger. While walking the girl's tiny rat-dog, a pit bull attacked the children. The boy jumped on the dog and applied a choke hold until authorities arrived. Nice, right? Here he is:

Okay, now, look at this, which I'm sure you've seen before:

Come ON. Right? Its not just me. Choke Forest, choke!

9-Year-Old Boy Hero in Pit Bull Attack - KGPE - CBS TV47

Redefining Presidential.

2009-01-08T09:25:00.001-08:00

Can is be? Eight years gone by so swiftly? Oh the good times. Luckily the BBC has a recap of various Bushisms that help blur past all the unpleasantness and corruption. Lets take a gander.

"They misunderestimated me."

Yes, but little did we know in 2000 by how much we had misunderestimated this wet noodle.

"I think war is a dangerous place."

Well, that's very true, I suppose. If war were a place it would be dangerous. Good.

"the vast majority of Iraqis want to live in a peaceful, free world. And we will find these people and we will bring them to justice."

Jebus, the Iraqis didn't hear this one did they? Cause it would have probably scared the shit out of them, what with it at least sounding coherent.

"You know, one of the hardest parts of my job is to connect Iraq to the war on terror."

I know.

"I have set high standards for our public schools, and I have met those standards."

Well, public grade schools anyway.

"It's clearly a budget. It's got a lot of numbers in it."

Lets hope he wasn't eyeing the McDonald's drive-thru menu.

"I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully."

But if I think fish have started making wmd's, they're going down.

"Those who enter the country illegally violate the law."

What're you, a lawyer now? Lets leave the fancy talk to the attorney general.

"A leadership is someone who brings people together."

That's probably a technical term from the air national guard. You know, 'form up on the leadership' or something.

"I'll be long gone before some smart person ever figures out what happened inside this Oval Office."

Yes, I imagine you've out smarted us all. Somehow.

BBC Bushisms

You're Getting The Axe

2009-01-08T06:58:00.001-08:00

This is awesome. Burger King has joined Facebook with an app, or whatever the kids are using these days. The only intriguing part is that part of the deal is that they'll give you a free whopper if you de-friend 10 people. Ha! joke's on them! They don't know how little I care for ~~GOB~~ my friends. Time to slaughter the goose, cause I'm stick of egg sandwiches. I bet I'm worth about 7 Whoppers on Facebook. I'm still not sure if the whopper comes out of the disc drive or the printer though.

Whopper Sacrifice: Ditch 10 Friends, Get a Free Whopper | So Good

Also, it occurs to me that I need to de-friend my friends before they de-friend me in exchange you hot meat-like sandwiches. It'll be interesting to see what type of effect this has on Facebook dynamics, an incentive to cull your less than BFFs.

Apple Math.

2009-01-07T07:05:00.001-08:00

You have got to be goddamn fucking kidding me. Yeah, Apple announced yesterday that they'd start removing the drm from the itunes store. (big deal) And there were whispers that you could actually remove the crippling restrictions from music you already actually own. Well its true, kinda, and here's the deal. Itunes is now iTunes Plus (which means that they're higher bitrate files without DRM) though apparently iTunes Plus music is 30 cents more than iTunes (minus?). So if you've got a buncha iT- songs that you actually paid to own, you can just pony up the difference to Apple and they'll swap them out for iT+ files! AMAZING! not. I'm not really sure how many audiophiles are rocking crappy white earbuds, but I'm betting the majority of people are just looking for unlocked meadia, not modearate increases in bitrate.

Lets, see, if I can burn about 22 songs onto a CD and can burn and rip a CD in about 12 minutes, I could process about 110 songs an hour. At 30 cents a song that's $33, minus the cost of 5 blank CDs, $32 an hour. So unless you'd be making more than that sitting around scratching your ass (I'm assuming you're not taking time off work to do this) its not really worth converting to iT+. Added bonus of the ripping method, you've got an extra CD to give to your ipodless friends, old school P2P style. (otherwise known as the mix tape) I haven't heard of the RIAA tracking anyone down for lending CDs to their friends yet.

Also, remember that Amazon sells DRMless music for between 79-99 cents every day and emusic.com's plans average out to between 40 and 26 cents per track. Apple is late to the party and all they brought was a half-full bottle of creme de banana. Puke.

Apple - iTunes - What's New - Download DRM-free music

You're Doing It Wrong.

2009-01-06T12:41:00.001-08:00

This dude is gonna have a great year.

Wimper.

2009-01-06T10:42:00.001-08:00

And that's why there's no more mac worlds. Its just hard to get so excited about $150 software updates that do what Google started giving away for free 6 months ago. And starting to sell undrmed music. Wow. Maybe they noticed that amazon and emusic were getting my money instead of them. I can't even get the enthusiasm to post a link. pff.

Cooking Devices Derived From The Inquisition.

2008-12-29T18:19:00.000-08:00

Okay, okay. So I may have been skeptical of specialized panini presses. I mean, sure its tasty when I get a sammich with lines on it from Pannera and everyhting, but never really thought its was oh-so-special. I was wrong. Panini means "make more delicious" in Italian. Like "you want I should panini that roast beef sandwich?" The answer should always be yes. Especially in winter. Hot meals are better than non-hot ones. I'll just have to hum a happy song to keep the sandwich screams from keeping me up at night. Daily Placebo does not condone sandwich torture and we're not willing to admit that Panini pressing is sandwich torture. But it seems like it.

The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year.

2008-12-29T11:59:00.001-08:00

Sweet sacarine, I love those precious few days just after Christmas where all holiday lunacy is confined to people's houses and not let lose to vomit all over my world. No more rabid shoppers running around (somehow very slowly) buying things to have bought things. No more excessive decorations popping up on every street corner. No more tinny bells shreaking outside the grocery store. (honestly, who has change in their pocket after buying groceries any more?) I really just like to luxuriate in the lack of consumer hordes and motorist clusterfucks. Of course then there's that nice little reprieve in early January when people are shocked at the inhospitabe frigid void that winter is without tinsel and santa hats. They stay inside until that first forecast of snow when they surge like locust on the local groceries and drugstores buying all the bread, milk and toilet paper they can lay their grubby hands on.

REM School.

2008-12-25T07:25:00.000-08:00

Last night I learned that if you can't find your car and end up stealing a school bus, do not continue to pick up kids on their way to school. They are a pain in the ass. Also, school buses off-road surprisingly well.

Shit's Going Down In Bethesda.

2008-12-23T08:43:00.001-08:00

That sounds like one big ass water main, to create a 4 ft wall of water. Anyway, the Beeb picked it up and put it on my rss feed. Its kinda odd to learn about local news from an international source.

Also, when I'm traveling internationally and people ask where I'm from and I say "Maryland" I sometimes wonder if I should take for granted that people A) know that I'm American and B) know what Maryland is. This article makes me think yes.

BBC NEWS | Americas | Flood traps motorists in Maryland

It Wasn't Us, It Was The Robots.

2008-12-22T07:55:00.001-08:00

So, this seems kinda like we're not exactly sure what the flying death-machines we released in the middle-east are up to. "Suspected" attacks by unmanned drones killed at least seven suspected Taliban members in Pakistan recently. Plausible robo-deniability? Of course this would have been easier to play off if John McCain hadn't laughed at Barrack during the debates about telling Pakistan before taking military action inside their borders.

"I'm not prepared to threaten it, as Senator Obama apparently wants to do, as he has said that he would announce military strikes into Pakistan. [...] Now, you don't do that. You don't say that out loud. If you have to do things, you have to do things [wink], and you work with the Pakistani government."

So basically the public position is that we're not sending airstrikes into Pakistan, and the Pakistani Government would consider it a violation of soverinity and counter productive. But on the down low, we do and they don't say anthing. Either that or we've got a bunch of predators that have gone all "Short Circuit" and are running vigilante missions in between make-out sessions with Ally Sheedy.

In fact, if you believe these sources, we've run at least 20 airstrikes in tribal Pakistani lands. Of course this is all complicated by the fact that Afghanistan and Pakistan can't exactly agree where the borders are...

REM School

2008-12-18T06:15:00.000-08:00

Last night I learned that if you make the US Olympic warrior ninja obstacle course team, do not leave your Olympic id in you other wallet or they will make you use the public library for Internet access. The lines are horrible.

Adventures In Exotic Pets.

2008-12-17T12:45:00.001-08:00

Help! My dog stinks real bad and won't stop biting the shit out of me. What should I do? Also Its got a big bushy tail and is always digging burrows. Well apparently you should take that thing to the zoo because its a rare fox. That's what you get for buying weird animals that you've never seen and are not quite sure what they look like. Now, I don't know exactly what a Pomeranian looks like, but I'm not trying to buy one either. Something about the phrase "he found the dog hard to tame" seems deliciously understated. Especially since this guy looks like he's been 'jacking off a bobcat in a phone booth'.

Ananova - Man's pet 'dog' was rare fox

Actually this sounds way more reasonable than thinking a sheep is a poodle.

Daily Placebo: Baaaaaad dog.

Driving makes people fat.

2008-12-17T07:22:00.001-08:00

Or, rather, not walking (as enabled by driving cars) makes people fat. As this miraculous new study discovers, the more people drive, the less they exercise. The real shocking part of this article is the cited mileage that Americans average per year. 87 miles. A year. That's 0.238 miles a day. The average person walks less than a lap on your high school track every day. Makes you want to go run a mile doesn't it?

Study Says Stop Driving, Fatty [Novelties] - Jalopnik

Categorize Me, Will You?

2008-12-17T07:12:00.001-08:00

So I was checking out my account balance on the web for my Ruth's Chris frequent eater's card. Yeah, I have a fancy steak card, big whoop, wanna fight about it? Anyway, I noticed at the top of the page a little snippet that, for some reason, is getting to me. Its the "Tier" section. BDay Tier? What, you think I only come in there for birthdays or something? Almost makes me want to start going a lot more often to see if i get upgraded to "Swnk Plyr" or "Rch MF" Tiers. Almost.

Cubelicious.

2008-12-12T12:20:00.001-08:00

Wow. Cube runner was one of the very first games I downloaded for my ipod. It was free, simple and awesome. Basically you're an arrow and you tilt the device to keep from running into cubes as you fly through the level. Simple yet addictive. I came with three level packs, and I think I did notice that there was an option to download more. Which I didn't think to look into until now.

Cube Runner: Level Packs « Neutron Dawn

Bam, really simply levels are text files with a bunch of xes all over the place. So not only can you download more level packs, you can make levels to decimate your friends. Cool enough?

Maybe not, but if you feel like you need control over the throttle, cube sprites, ship design, stackable obstacles, and an on device level editor, you can plunk down the three bucks in the app store. I'm thinkin about it.

Cube Runner 2 Now in App Store | FingerGaming

Friday Highlight.

2008-12-12T10:43:00.001-08:00

Now this is a blog I can get behind. I mean, there's only so many lolcatz I can stand.

Damn cute animals think they're better than me...

Fuck You, Penguin

All Growed Up.

2008-12-12T06:00:00.001-08:00

That was fast. I feel like 100 days is some kind of record for a Google product coming out of beta. (gmail is still beta 4 and a half years later) But the switch has been flipped and Chrome is now no longer one of the many undercooked (half-baked?) ideas simmering in the Google Labs. Make sure to click "wrench -> about" to check for the latest version. (1.0.154.36) Hopefully there'll be support for extensions soon to take care of those ads.

Official Google Blog: Google Chrome ~~(BETA)~~

Tips for Millionaires.

2008-12-11T07:46:00.001-08:00

I know I'm not sitting around on mounds of bills, lighting cigars with Franklins, or devising other extravagant ways to waste money. So I may not be in the best position to provide critiques to those who are, but here goes anyway. If you don't have enough cash to paint your entire Aston Martin with gold paint don't paint any of it with gold paint. Sweet jebus.

Custom Cars: Gold Leaf "Premium Bond" Aston Martin DB7 Tackier Than Roger Moore

REM School.

2008-12-11T06:15:00.001-08:00

Last night I learned that you do NOT want a pack of velociraptors loose on an underwater research station.

Puppies: Natures Space Heater.

2008-12-10T10:27:00.001-08:00

Puppies will save your children. Go get some. Now. A three year-old in Virginia was lost in the woods and kept warm by two puppies while he slept. Now, as nauseatingly cute as this story may be, I can't help but read the article and chuckle. Apparently this kids was:

last seen wearing a red long sleeve shirt, blue jeans and cowboy boots. He may also be wearing a camouflage jacket.

Hmm... you gave him camo? There's just something humorous about a kid lost in the woods wearing camouflage. Although I guess it could be worse...
Kid's Ghillie Suit Set

Missing three-year-old found safe in Halifax County | WSLS 10

Now I KNOW.

2008-12-09T19:45:00.000-08:00

Okay, so a couple weeks ago I got pseudo rear-ended whilst on my way to return merchandise to the local Best Buy. (this is not an endorsement of Best Buy, in fact, tally that up on your list of reasons why retail is for suckers.) It was the old triple car bumper brawl where one person hits another and the hitee drifts forward like a jackass and crunches my tail as I gaze fixedly at the mirror in disbelief. Anyway, it wasn't very serious, but the bottom of my bumper was cracked thusly:

Do you see it? That line near the light part? Well, there's also some spider cracking of the paint in there too. The kinda thing that would have pissed me off every time I walked past the back of my car. If it'd been the civic I might have been less of a stickler about it. But I like my car and since I was just sitting there, and completely not at fault, I wanted them to fix it; damn it. So I jumped through all the insurance company loops. Talked to adjuster after adjuster; gave no less than 4 recorded statements; drove to my insurance company's office to have an estimate written. After an excruciatingly long period (of about 6 days) they all finally agreed that I shouldn't have to pay for the repairs. Booyah; I drop the RSX off at the body shop they specified and was shuttled to the Enterprise to take possession of this behemoth.
It was this or a white panel van. Seriously, that's all they had on the lot. Whatever, I was just glad I wasn't paying for a rental or taking the bus. I drive a small car with a tight suspension; this durango was absolutely cavernous and handled like a uhaul truck. Maybe I should have gone with the van. So after a week of walking in a soccer mom's shoes I think I'm in a better position to make this statement. SUVs suck. There is no reason for someone who drives on roads to haul around that much metal. I mean, yeah, it took speed bumps like a champion, but at what cost?

I didn't actually keep track of the mileage I got, but I have to assume it wasn't great. Here's the fuelly page for durangos, and while the 2007's may end up getting better mileage than previous years (there aren't any recorded fuel-ups for 07s) I'm gonna guess its not all that much better than an 18 average. Luckily I got to fill it up with that cheap crap fuel I haven't bought since 2007, so the 17 gallon half-tank was about on par with my usual full-tank price.

Whatever, I know, and you know, that SUVs get terrible gas mileage as a natural result of weighing a ton* more than my car. (*actually only 1829 pounds more.) What I really learned from this week was more about how an SUV drives. I actually got fairly comfortable maneuvering in close quarters. The turn radius was reasonable and the side mirrors were like full-length hallway mirrors. So when you see someone floundering in a parking lot, making 15-point turns or parking in two spaces, that person has either had their SUV fewer than three days or they are a terrible driver. No, the real concern to me was the transmission. I know its been a while since I drove an automatic, but I distinctly remember that when you let off the gas pedal the car begins to decelerate. This is not the case with the durango. At highway speeds removing my foot from the accelerator completely had virtually no effect for about a half mile. I'm not sure if this is a result of the engine's idle speed or the vehicle's mass, but I find it completely unacceptable.

In fact, in most cases, if I wanted to stop accelerating I had to tap the brake pedal. I'm not sure if I've ever decried over-use of brakes on the highway here, but I believe it to be the cause of numerous collisions and at best billions in wasted fuel and time. Although now I somewhat understand the phenomenon. These goram cars won't slow down without braking! Ridiculous. Now more than ever I think we should push to require tail-lights to be analog.

Anyway, I just figured I share my findings. There is a reason SUVs needlessly brake so much, although I'd rather we got rid of them than fix the problem.

Update
damn i love my car.

Art Day.

2008-12-02T11:53:00.001-08:00

So here's some kinda collage I made with some of my pictures from walking around Silver Spring.
I wonder what the Collage industry's ad campaign would look like.
You know, if they were on the ball like those cheese or milk dudes.

"Collage, the inept man's paintbrush."

Somehow I imagine them all playing to the lazy or artistically enfeebled among us.
I'm allowed to say that kinda thing cause I can't draw. Trust me.

Pardon Me, Do You Have any Gulden's Spicy Brown Mustard?

2008-11-25T06:51:00.001-08:00

Hmmm.... Looks like Bush has a soft spot for people who destroy wildlife, snort cocaine and misallocate bank funds. Oh also folks who mislead and steal from the Government. It almost seems like he's trying to get the pardon train rolling for Obama. "See, New Guy, these are the kindsa things the President pardons people fer. Hint."

The Associated Press: Bush pardons 14 and commutes 2 prison sentences

Holy Crap Guys.

2008-11-21T06:24:00.001-08:00

So I bought a computer yesterday. I was only kinda in the market, but NewEgg sent me this deal that I just couldn't pass up. Like seriously, I just couldn't stop thinking about it so I had to pull the trigger if only so my brain could get around to the other tasks I had. Anyway, I just got my invoice email a few minutes ago which contained a tracking link. Here's my status:

Sweet jebus! You almost delivered the machine before the email telling me it was coming. And that was on the cheapest shipping option. What happens if you pick the $76 one? Would it have arrived last Monday?

Keep Gas Expensive.

2008-11-19T13:25:00.000-08:00

Have you seen a gas station lately? Its like they're giving that mess away. I'm half tempted to rub some in my armpits so I can savor the savings all day long. But that would be wasteful, and maybe a little bit dangerous. So I don't.

I do use Fuelly to track my miles per gallon over time and compare with my cohorts. But sometimes getting so wrapped up in MPG confuses just how much you're getting screwed over the price of gas. Did you get accustomed to paying $3.70 and thinking you were doing pretty damn well for yourself? Yeah me too.

I'd wistfully recall the good old days when I could top off and President Jackson would have my back. But at a little over $4 a gallon I've got Grant on a search party for Lincoln to cover the cost. Not really a prospect that makes you smile, but since you're accustomed, why not leverage it?

Tip #6: Use gas prices to become your own hedge fund | I Will Teach You To Be Rich

This article describes "fuel hedging" as airlines typically do to protect themselves from rate increases. (you may be able to do the same with your heating oil company) Hedging on your gasoline costs involves the same type of though process, although you won't be saving because of the mass scale of your purchases. Its more like a method to highlight how much you're saving, rather than let that money slip away on beer and cotton candy.

Ramit suggests tracking cost per week, but I'm using the average cost of a tank per month instead. (mostly because my expenditures aren't exactly linear; granted there are variations like the actual amount in a 'tank' but I'm willing to sacrifice for simplicity's sake) I've looked at my recent purchases and decided that I'm fairly comfortable with paying $40 for a tank of gas. Oddly enough that's well under what's been going on for the past few months.

If we take a peek at last year in comparison, a $40 hedge might seem excessive. Especially since I started the year paying about $25 a tank. (I did start buying 93 octane in April, but that's not the sole factor here)

So you can see the basic trend, when gas prices are low, I'd be pocketing the difference into a special account. And when its expensive I'd have money already set aside. Well, I haven't been running this hedge fund since 2007, but if I'd been prescient enough to realize that gas would top $4.60 here's what it would look like.

And here's this year taking into account the outstanding surplus I'd attained in 2007.

That's right, paying $40 a tank for the past two years would still come up short after the shenanigans this summer. You could make the case that I'm just tricking myself not to spend that money somewhere else, and you'd be absolutely right. But I also factor the hedge savings into my fuel budget, artificially keeping the price high. Americans set record lows for miles driven this summer, mainly because of the cost per mile. So this should motivate me to drive less and save more, but instead of handing those excesses over to the oil companies I could start saving for my next, more efficient vehicle.

The Ants Screw Me Again.

2008-11-19T10:22:00.001-08:00

Okay, so I've got a bit of history with ants. Honestly, these dudes are annoying, right? Well some kinda researchers think that ants may be the solution to some of our traffic congestion woes.

When the narrow route, as expected, became congested, ants know to tell each other to redirect their travels. An ant returning from the congested narrow route encounters another ant heading up that route and pushes that ant towards the wider lane.

Ants May Teach Us How to Drive Better | EcoGeek - Clean Technology

Seems like it'd make sense, right? Individuals who've just traveled on a path can communicate with those headed the opposite direction into the observed conditions. Oddly enough this eerily reminds me of an idea I postmarked on 2/21/07. Take a look:

Wireless Real-time Itinerant Social Traffic System

A mobile system that uses social information, made publicly available, to
compile useful individual results for a single entity of the entire
social group.

The system would harvest speed, congestion and general flow
information from a vehicle's on-board sensors and create a recent
database track with geographic locations, times and infrastructure
conditions. No optical or radio traffic monitoring equipment (to gather data on opposing cars
without WRISTS installed) is required, but may enhance the overall
community performance if present. As the vehicle proceeds on its route
it actively searches with a wireless connection for oncoming vehicles
also equipped with a compatible system.

When a peer is found the systems trade recent databases,
merging current road condition information. Each vehicle now possesses
a complete local traffic map of the area with reliability ratings pertaining to data recency and surety of diagnosis. (some traffic
patterns are easier to diagnose) Vehicles may also choose to rate
personally collected data higher, or flag data, so that inconsistencies
can be leveled out of the network should errors arise.

The in-vehicle system will then use this information in its on
screen navigation, creating alternate routes to minimize travel time
(or another variable at the users discretion) to way-points in the
infrastructure. The information may be displayed on the navigation
screen by classifying roads into color groups, or may be used silently
by the system to reroute traffic.

Systems will need to be self tuning, calibrating for how long
data may be used before it is no longer representative and must be
discarded. In some areas 2 hours and 100 miles of data may be useful,
while in other areas 15 minutes and 4 miles is the maximum lifespan.

The system will also learn tendencies of specific roads over
time for personal use, should a user frequent a particular area. This
will allow for general prediction of traffic
flows in routing. So if a thoroughfare is clear at 7:30, but is
usually full at 8:10, the system can compute ETA to the hot spot and
smartly disregard "road clear" information that it calculates likely to
be out of date on arrival. This average road condition prediction is
not for social use, only recently harvested information is transmitted
throughout the network. In addition existing traffic broadcast systems or fixed traffic
counters may be integrated into routing because they mark known
accidents and closures, but this information is for personal use, not
socially distributed. This is intended to maintain the purity of the
network so that only fresh and near-firsthand information is used which
will eventually result in better local response times than widely
aggregated reports of a metropolitan area.

With multiple users an entire area of main thoroughfares can be mapped fairly quickly, depending on traffic speed and transmission range. The more users there are, the more current and ubiquitous the data will be.

When enough users are enabled, oncoming traffic will act as a conduit for road information to stopped traffic. For example(figure 2): A car (A) in a traffic
jam can pass information to car (B) as it proceeds in the opposite
direction. Car (B) will in turn pass information to car (C) which is
pointed the same direction as car (A) and in the same traffic jam. Car (C) can then use information passed backwards down the traffic jam to decide whether to reroute or to wait for traffic to clear.

In more advanced situations cars with similar repeated tracks may suggest "bond" may also communicate destination way-points.

To
study: minimum number of devices for system to function. Effect of
congestion avoidance on quality of data, multiple concurrent reroutes.
Make extrapolated congestion based on routes and reported trends
public? (figure1: assume traffic is red between 7:12 and 7:17 links)

Freaking ants stole my idea and sold it to some German Scientists! And you call me crazy when I rant about ladybugs trying to kill me and not being able to trust insects.

The Wrongly Accused.

2008-11-18T10:36:00.000-08:00

Well that election is over, finally. So there's a lot less stuff out there to get my ire up. But of course there's always the old standby, mobile phones. Slate has an article this morning about the things Google stole from Apple when designing Android. Now, I'm the first to call myself a Google fanboy or an Apple hater, so I'm definitely biased in this exchange. But COME ON!

The author starts by referring to the font technology that Steve Jobs developed and quickly spread to all graphical computers. Fair enough, I spose that may well be true. But I'm not sure that basic typography and formatting wouldn't have spread to computers, especially as they became more mainstream. Next he brings up Google's Android font, custom designed by a font contractor, claiming that it is usable and stylish which makes it reminiscent of Apple. Odd, I'd think Google would get original 'cred' for not using the same fonts as other companies, but creating a fresh set with a particular use in mind. Unless of course Apple has cornered the market on making anything stylish and usable... they don't have a copyright on making well designed things do they? Whatever, font is small potatoes, what else you got?

The G1 and the Android operating system are not copies of the iPhone and its software... But in a deeper sense, everything about the Google phone seems inspired and indebted to the iPhone... like the iPhone, the Google phone's best feature is its attractive, well-designed interface.

Wha... what? Still on this noise? Android is biting on the iPhone because it has usable software?

You turn it on to see a bright, uncluttered main menu that features a handful of icons for frequently used apps. To load one up, simply tap the screen with your finger—yup, just like you've seen people do on those iPhone commercials.

Seriously? Pressing icons to open a program. I thought we were past Apple owning the concept of a GUI. In application design components should be familiar and or intuitive. I'm inclined to believe that pressing an icon or button and having something happen is intuitive. And even if it wasn't, the iPhone is not the device that made it familiar. People have been clicking and pressing buttons on screens for years. I still remember using the card catalog touch screen at the library when I was like 8. Mostly I think this slate author needs to acquaint himself with some other touchscreen offerings, or perhaps contemplate the multitude of non-telephony ancestors of present day innovation. What do you think we mean when we say convergence device?

The iPhone lists all of your apps on its main menu; you don't need to navigate any deeper menus to get to them. But the G1 hides its many preloaded apps...

Uh, listing off differences in the interface implementation kinda undermines your whole point, don't you think? And honestly, this drives me crazy. My iPod Touch has 5 screens of icons that I have to flip thorough to find the one I want. If I could organize them into some type of folder structure or menu I'd be a happy camper. But no, Apple has made the decision for me that this is the easiest way to find what I'm looking for.

Google's best Android idea is filched directly from Apple: Android Market

That's a shame. The market place, while strikingly similar to the App Store, is not the overwhelming innovation. Android is a revolution because it is an open source mobile phone operating system created by a software company who's primary goal is organizing information. Google decided that there was no reason mobile operators should continue to pump out crappy software as the status quo. It integrates cloud computing with mobile access in a way that is intended to pervade the entire mobile handset industry. You don't have to get a G1, there will be hundreds of options with a familiar and usable interface.

On to the Market... I had a phone in high school that could download and run BREW apps; for a fee of course. Hell my phone now downloads games and apps that were 3rd party developed, approved by my carrier and placed in a central repository. A great idea sure, but not as revolutionary as you think, so much as as evolutionary. (ironically, iTunes on a mobile device is a newer and more exciting development, rather than an application warehouse)

I believe there is good reason for the overwhelming success of the App Store in comparison to its earlier predecessors. Its slick implementation and the hardware features of the iPhone may help, but the App Store's real secret lies in several 'inferior' generations of iPods and the rabid hacker turned developer community which grew as a result. That's the reason I drank the koolaid and bought a Touch, and that's the real hurdle that Google will have to overcome to make a serious 3rd party Marketplace. Luckily, Apple is setting up a walled garden approach a la early 90's AOL, which leaves the real mobile processing market available.

Apple has a good thing going in the "just works" niche, but that naturally limits customization and adaptation. Luckily Apple has no problem telling people what they want; and we have no problem being told apparently. Really, would you see the iPhone the same without that confidence and swagger that this is the solution? I don't think so. Which is the real magic of the iPhone that Google just can't steal.

What the Google phone stole from the iPhone. - By Farhad Manjoo - Slate Magazine